life is filled with Pretty Things, enjoy them!

I DID IT!!!!!

2011-11-18T12:54:00.003+01:00

hiya, i did it! i beat the monster!!! yesterday i had my check up mammo and ultrasound and blood tests and all was clear!!! the cancer has gone! left the building!!!! i am so happy! it's a huge weight off my shoulders, an enormous relief! i am still trying to get my head around it to be honest, i feel kind of numb, don't fully grasp it yet.

i can feel the tension that has been building op these last 11 months, now that i don't need to fight and be strong i can feel how tired i really am. i could just crawl up in a little ball and sleep for a few weeks but no! last night i celebrated with pink champagne!!!

today i made my first appointment with the plastic surgeon, doesn't sound like a big deal but trust me it is! my heart was pounding like mad while i was on the phone!!! 13 February 2012 i will see him, yeah, long wait but it's okay, i need the time to get myself mentally ready for this next step. in the meantime i need to get some strength back so as from next week i'll go swimming once a week with a friend, start small and build myself back up, pick up the pieces.

it is really strange, like standing at an intersection and not knowing which way to go, kind of not knowing where my place is in this universe. i'm not exactly the person is was before...

i have an appointment with my psychologist this coming Tuesday, he will help me clear things up lol!

I think i'm just going to enjoy life for a while, not worry too much about the future, just enjoy now.

love & peace

tanya

time flies!!

2011-11-10T13:59:00.006+01:00

hi, hi, hi,

haven't written for a while, but no news i good news they say...

i had a busy summer, i went to spain for the last 2 weeks of july, mostly to rest but i did manage to play alot in Sue's workshop area in her shop, we had so much fun! we had a very peaceful day at the beach, lounging under an umbrella, doing nothing but nap, read, talk,...

Sue, Colin and the spanish sun did me the world of good, so much that i went back for the last 2 weeks of august too! my wonderful son bought me a suprise ticket to Alicante as a gift for going through the cancer ordeal the way i did.

I went to Kars for KKD, tried to do the 2 days but it was still too much for me, i went home the second day, i was so tired. meeting everyone, all asking how i was doing, talking about the cancer all the time, some people never knew i had cancer and even asked why i cut my hair so short, shock when i told them... it was hard for me but on the other hand a few more women are now warned that you can not always feel lumps by checking your breast yourself, no matter how good you do it!

anyway, what else? oh there was SCRApTASTiC of course! they did so well on the organization!!! all the workshops were great, met the other cool teachers an d lots of new faces from all other the world! it was fun but again still too much for me but i did it and i was happy!!

so looking forward to next year!

i've just come back from a week in Ireland with my daughter Debby! oh we had such a great time!!! i was totally exhausted when we got home but it was worth it! i have always wanted to go to Ireland, it was on my bucket list! i have decided to work off a few things fron my bucket list, not to be pessimistic but i will not just sit around and wait to see if the can cer is totally gone or will come back!! i want to live and do the things i like and have always wanted to do!

so Ireland was a wonderful holiday, Debby and i got along soooo well it was beautiful and gave me so much energy! it is a beautiful country, lots of nature and green everywhere.

i have painted! a big angel as a wedding present for friends of my daughter Inez, they had been wanting a painting from me for so long so it was an ideal gift! i don't have pics :(( but i hope to get one from them soon! i don't know why i didn't take pics before i let it go.

how am i feeling? so so to be honest! i am so happy about all the things i have been able to do since my chemo and radiation, i have done way more than i could have imagined but i do pay the price by having to rest for days afterwards but i am willing to take that.

i haven't planned my reconstruction yet, i'm not strong enough to go through the op but i will get there. i have stil not come to terms with my new body, i never will! i just can't! i joke about it and i don't let it keep me from doing things but i still hate it and i have my days of crying myself to sleep. time and surgery will heal.

my cancer tests are coming up... next week a new mamo and other tests, it scares me! 23rd of november i get my results so it is a scary wait. i am trying to stay positive but in a way i just don't want to feel anything, just wait for the facts and take it from there i guess.

oh one more thing! i cleaned up my workroom, with great help from my daughter Inez! i am so pleased with the result, it took us a full week and 4 visits to ikea! and i have upset a disc in my back, had to res for a few weeks before i left for ireland, i am still having bother with it but hey! my workroom looks fab!!

so, i'll be back when i get my results, keep your fingers crossed for me please!

love & peace

tanya

bring on the Summer!

2011-07-08T09:49:00.002+02:00

done done done! all treatment is behind me!!! well except for the meds i need to take for the next 5 years put that is just a pill a day, that doesn't bother me.

I'm glad i got through, maybe not undamaged but i got through non the less; It's been a long six months and i couldn't have done it without the support of my family and friends and many people worldwide checking in to see how is was doing.
I am extremely grateful for all the mails, messages, cards, presents, phonecalls,.... it kept me going, it reminded me that i am loved and liked and that there are millions of reasons to hang around as long as possible.

well, this is my Summer, i plan to enjoy, relax, gain strength, let my hair grow, hopefully get my eyebrows and eyelashes back cause that is what i miss the most! i look so different without them!!

once i feel better i'll have to start planning my reconstruction cause one thing is for sure, i'm not going to stay like this! i can and will not get used to missing a boob! nope! well, that is for long after the Summer anyhow maybe even for next summer depending on what the doc says.

I'm going to Spain for a much needed time off and catch up with my friend Sue and her husband Colin, it'll do me the world of good to get away and soak up some sun and fun.

I still haven't finished the painting i started, i'm just not in the mood and i'm not going to force it but i promise to post as soon as it's done.

right off again, my physical therapist will be here any minute!!

love & peace
tanya xxx

getting there

2011-06-08T21:59:00.002+02:00

i can't believe i haven't written since March! life has just been passing me by mostly.
i am done with the chemo, so happy to be able to say that! it was long and hard but it's over!!
now i'm doing the radiotherapy, 8 more goes of the 26 i needed so that too is nearly done with!
my hair is starting to grow back, i have peach fuzz on my head lol, the kids call me fluffy!
my body still aches, i'm still extremely tired most days but i'm happy and hopeful.
i don't know the outcome yet, my first tests are in August, a painful wait but i'm just going to live and try not to think about it!
right, short post, i just wanted to update because alot of people have been getting worried, wondering how i have been doing.
oh, last week i started to paint, i'll show when i'm finished.
love & peace
tanya xxx

nearly halfway

2011-03-10T14:01:00.006+01:00

tomorrow i have my 3rd chemo, yeah i know, i never blogged about the 2nd one, for one it hit me pretty hard the first few days and i slept almost 80% of my time just not to have to deal with it cause i really wanted to die o be honest! Chemo is pure poison and you can feel it taking over your body, pretty scary.

anyway, towmorrow i reach the halfway mark for he chemo, i never thought i would get this far, i wanted to give up after the first but no matter how i feel i really haven' got a choice, i need to go through the treatment if i want to have a chance to see my kids grow up.

you would thing i'm going through enough already, well my ex-husband doesn't seem to think so!

I booked a weekend away with all five of the kids for my youngest daughter's 8th birthday, i miscalculated the weekends for them going to their dad so i ended up booking for one of his weekends, i didn't do it to bug him, it was an honest chemo brain mistake; I asked him if we could exchange weekends so we could go but hell no! he doesn't want to; my daughter is hearbroken over it and i am totally p'ed off with him, he is doing it to get to me but at the same time he is hurting the kids but he doesn't see that.

i hae now had to cancel the booking, paying half of the cost of the weekend as fee and then booked a weekend earlier and paying the full amount again. it sucks! now it is a verrrry expensive weekend Sunparks but hey what can i do?

ok, not much to talk about, my life is not that exciting at the moment!
wish me luck for tomorrow's chem
xx love & peace , tanya

fingers crossed

2011-02-14T10:48:00.003+01:00

i'm keeping my fingers crossed, if all goes well i may be going home today!!
Nine days in hospital is more than i can take! i soooo want to go home to my kids.
It has been a rollercoaster ride!
in the meantime my hair dropped out, hair everywhere, evenhough it was shaved short it still was everywhere and i hurt like hell, for one night it was like my head was on fire, i sat with ice packs on my head for hours to ease the pain! not all of it dropped out but most of it so i had to have it shaved bald and it really takes some getting used to, some of my friends say it suits me, that i can pull it off and i must say i do have a pretty skull lol! as for as pretty goes for skulls that is :)

anyway, hopefully i can go home today and i can say bye to the staff, except for the food here i cannot complain! the staff have been WONDERFUL! most of them remember me from my back surgery and that helps but honestly they have been great, so helpful and kind, understaffed or not they are a super bunch!!

Friday chemo 2 of 6 and let's hope i don't go as deep this time! i don' think i will, i think they know now which meds to give me to make it easier and i am definetly getting the Neulasta injections for my white blood cells, now that i have medical indication to recieve them the inssurance will automatically pay for them, they are expensive, over a 1000 euro each time and i will get them for every chemo.

okay, off to watch some more daytime tv lol! hope to post from home next time.

love & peace x

pffff...

2011-02-08T18:59:00.005+01:00

okay chemo sucks! I'm am not one of the lucky few that go through firs chemo like a breeze! it is awful and heavy!

the first evening i felt so ill, i was as white as a sheet and just crawled up in a ball when i got home
the weekend was better! much better! i could eat quite normally but then i was still on heavy meds against the nausea, Emend is a goooood drug lol!
but after 2 days of meds that was it, i became so ill, i couldn't hold anything down, no food, no drinks, i felt so sick and exhausted and ended up spending half a day in hospital on Wednesday trying to get some fluids in me and getting a miracle shot of Litican.
i kept taking Litican in tablets for the next day or two and slowly i was able to eat again.

i had a wonderful weekend with my daughter Debby, she came home for the weekend. We even went into the city to a Goth shop lol, totally her scene, we had a fun time together.
Sunday i wasn't feeling my usual self, muscle aches and splitting headache and just so tired but i stayed up until Debby left and then went straight for a nap. woke up shivering and damn i had a fever and i am not supposed to have fevers so off to emergancy i had to go and yeah they kept me in hospital.
thank goodness for wireless in the hospital because i'm still here!!
my white blood cell count is too low, my platelets are too low and i have an infection they cannot localize, still getting high temperatures and my blood pressure is way too low.

Chemo was just too heavy for my body and is kicking my butt! but the doctors are thinking up all things possible to make the next round easier on me.

i'm bored stiff in hospital! no visitors allowed besides family, but not the kiddies so i skype with them and they enjoy that. private room for fear of infection so nobody to talk to... pfff days are long and daytime tv sucks!!!

well anyway, waiting for my white blood cell count to go up up up!!! and fever to stay away for at least 48 hours and then i can go home! sadly my temperature is still too high at the moment so it kind of sucks!!!

and then.... next week back to chemo with hopefully more meds against the side effects of the poison!

1 down 5 to go! i just hope they all don't put me in hospital cos the journey is already a long one and it is really hard organizing everything with the kids.

oh and my hair is shaved, Debby did it for me so now i won't have to go through seeing it drop out.
well it is already droppin out but it doesn't feel so bad because my hair is only 1mm long now :)

right almost lunchtime here! that'll be an adventure again!!! i know hospital food is not like home cooking but damn it's bad! asa vegeterian i have a choice of 2 diff burgers, honest to god you could kill someone with them, they are so hard and dry. soup has beef or chicken stock in it so not for me either! i have actually got my own cup a soups with me and a tiny kettle and my son brings me home made bread so at least i get something to eat.
doesn't feel like the right place to get my strength back! when i was in here for my back surgery i lost 4,5kg, with my mastectomy i lost 3kg in 4 days so i wonder how much it'll be this time!

ok, my tray arrived lol i have to go

love & peace
tanya

1st chemo

2011-01-28T06:37:00.002+01:00

i haven't posted since Xmas, not that there hasn't been alot going on, i just didn't have the urge to write much i did have a pretty long post ready last week but never finished it and then deleted it.

life sucks when you have cancer, that is what it kind of boils down to honestly, positive attitude is mostly down the drain, i can't help it, i just feel so upset and scared and can't just get it out of my head that i might not be around to see my youngest kids grow up.

i'm having what looks like post traumatic stress disorder but am starting to see a psychologist about it today at the hospital while having my first chemo

1st chemo of 6 and i am scared to death of the poison that is supposed to kill the cancer.

i haven't been able to paint my way through all of this, i had surgery on my hand just days after my mastectomy, this was planned before i knew about the cancer and i wanted it to go through because i could hardly hold a brush in my hand due to pain and loss of control over a few fingers. hand still sucks! is not healing well, is really stiff and painful, doc says it's take another 4 weeks at least, i really feel the need to paint, to stay sane, to let things out.

anyway, 1st chemo in about 2 hours so i better get moving! i wanted to post now because i have been receiving messages from worried people, just so you all know i'm still here alive and kicking, well not so much kicking, more like rolled up in a ball crying most of the time... so not like me huh? i know.
this thing just seems way bigger than me at the moment. i cannot get used to how i look after op1boob, i just can't.

i have alot of support from friends and family, it helps, it really does, i wouldn't go on if it weren't for all of them. i have had to be so strong over the last years it feels like i've used up all my strength.

right, got to go, hopefully i'm not too sick with the stupid chemo and i get a chance to update you before the next one.

i really wish i had some art to show, this is what my blog was intended for! i'm sorry for all those who i'm boring with the cancer journey instead of pretty things!

love & peace

xx tanya

OP1BOOB

2010-12-26T09:47:00.002+01:00

first of all: MERRRRRRY XMAS! a little too late but i hope al of you out there had a wonderful Christmas with family, good food and lots of joy.

I'm still in hospital so i spent my Xmas here and the kids did their very best to make it nice, they brought lots of food, homemade pastry, my son has talent!! We had a cosy evening, they stayed till about midnight i think, can't remember but anyway, it was as nice as could be.

I had my op1boob on Thursday as planned, no chance in reconstruction staight away because another test had proven that the cancer in my lymphs was invasive too so i will have to go through a heavy course of chemo first and then about 30 rounds of radiation.
But you know what? I'm not as shocked as i thought i would be, sure i cried when i first saw how flat my t-shirt was on one side! sure i howled for over an hour in the bathroom the first time i washed myself, i cried until i couldn't recognize my own face in the mirror, sure i've been walking around in a somewhat zombie fashion trying to wake up from this nightmare!
but the fact remains that my boob is gone, it is ugly, i look like a teenage boy on the left side, my remaing boob looks way too big for my body all of a sudden, i kind of wish they had just chopped that one off too, just for balance!
but i can look at it now, i'm not so scared of it, it is what it is, it looks weird, it hurts, the drains are the worst! omg!!!!! still ggot one drain stuck in, they removed one yesterday i nearly fainted! hopefully the last one goes today cause it really is uncomfortable having a tube stuck in your chest and having to walk around with this yukkie bottle stuck in a gift bag! yeah they put my drainage bottle in this little gift bag with a cute little elephant on it that says:" i like to play"... uhhhh??? okay!?! i don't find that very amusing to be honest.

The op went as it was supposed to, they took out a lot of lymphs, everything will be tested so they can plan my chemo and possibly hormonal treatment in four weeks time.

four weeks to let the wound heal, a bit of a rest before the next fight, another big nasty fight with the chemo and i am scared, i really am but then again i was scared to death of having my boob chopped off and i survived that too, i have even been able to laugh and smile after that, what else can i do???

My kids bought me a super cool Sony digital book reader! just what i needed right now! i love the old fashioned feel of holding a book but i tell you this E reader is really handy, light, easy to read, i just love it!!!!

right, i need to go, stuff to be done, even in hospital there is no rest for the wicked!

love you all! thanks for all your support!!
xxx

here goes...

2010-12-19T07:44:00.002+01:00

hi,
first of all thank you for all the heart warming comments and mails and messages, i have not been able to respond to all of them personally simply because there are so many and i don't always feel up to it but i embrace each and every bit of support and if all of you see me as a strong woman then i guess i should try and believe you all and do my best to get through this;
at this moment i don't feel so strong, i feel tiny, tiny tiny tiny!! it feels like the cancer is a huge mountain i need to climb, i know i will make it, it's not like i have a choice now really?!?!

so, this is what is up: last Wednesday i went for the staging, for you who have no idea ( and i wish i hadn't either) staging is a list of tests such as a bone scan, lung Xray, ultrasound of the abdomen, MRI of the breasts in my case, blood been taken by what i swear was a vampire!, i think that was the list but there might have been more tests, it was a long 4 hours of it all and i kind of stepped out of my body during the whole thing!
so, wednesday staging, Wednesday evening i get a phone call from doc saying i need to come in for a CT scan because they found something on my liver, now my world started spinning there for a moment because that could mean that the cancer had spread and that was something i had never really considered, call me weird but i kind of feel things and i really had never included more than breast cancer into my picture
Anyway, the CTscan showed some gathering of blood vessles in my liver, no cancer! as a thought! but it did give me a huge scare and made me pretty angry at the whole world.

my results came back as stage 2b breast cancer, this means i have 4 invasive malignant tumours in my breast, some larger than 2cm and all spread apart with at least 1cm distance and that is where the trouble is!!! they are not one group of tumours, they are all seperate tumours coming originally from one tumour, this is called multifocal breast cancer. the b stands for the fact that my lymphs have been affected too.
this means i need a full mastectomy, in other words they are cutting off my whole breast and taking out most of my lymphs.
This did not come as such a shock anymore, it is what i had expected all along, even when they were still talking about the possibility of a breast saving operation i never believed it, i knew it would be this result, again, just call me weird!

I'm seeing a prof tomorrow to discuss my options for reconstruction along with the mastectomy, my chances are slim to non for this happening because of the gravity of the cancer but i'm going to hang on to the 0.1% chance for now!!!!!

My surgery is now planned for Thursday 23 December, meaning i can stay home for my birthday but will be in hospital over Christmas, this stinks!!!! but they want it out and i want it out!!!
I really don't want to go into 2011 with these tumours, they will not be a part of my new year!
Radiation and chemo however will be a big part of my year and then hopefully i will get a reconstruction done for my 2011 birthday!!!! a girl can dream!!!!

I feel loads of things, there is a storm raging inside my body and mind.
I was totally calm and rational when the doc was discussing it all with me, i remained calm for the rest of the day mostly, i still am pretty calm, i feel the need to scream and cry and rage but it's not happening, i can't do it.
I feel too sad, angry, aggressive,... to let it all out! i know i should and i will, but not just yet i guess.

I am dreading waking up with one boob!!! it is something that just does not feel right!!!! and lots of people are telling me it doesn't make me who i am, that i will still be a whole woman no matter what, and i understand what they are saying but it does not feel like that to me!
To me it just feels like i am going to be mutalated for the rest of my life, i can't feel anything past that feeling yet.

silver lining??? Tanya always finds one huh?
well!!!! my daughter Debby is coming tomorrow, staying for my birthday! I'm really happy about that!!! I will have all 5 my children with me on my birthday! is something to be grateful for! and i am

another one? well... doc suggested a reconstruction with my own body material meaning i will be having a "tummy tuck" at the same time as the reconstruction! a new boob and a flat tummy!!
this a a very thin silver lining and i'm being more sarcastic about it than happy to be honest but hey a least it will be flat and that after having 5 kids!!! I will have to stop losing weight though, the rate i'm going now i'll have nothing for them to use!! I've gone down 2 sizes jeans in about 9 weeks and my new ones are already getting too big and i only bought them about 2 weeks ago.

anyway, this wil probably be the last post till after 'operation one boob' as i am calling it so i want to wish you all a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!! i hope you all spend it with loved ones, with great food ( not the hospital veggie stuff i will be getting lol!) count your blessings as i will be doing and enjoy!!!
if anything, ENJOY!!!!!

i'll be back after op1boob to rave/rage again!

love & peace
tanya

oh and to all you women out there being too chicken to get a mammo done..... please put it on your list for 2011!!!! promise!!!!

my year of bad luck is not done yet...

2010-12-09T06:17:00.002+01:00

hi blog readers,
i've been a stranger for a long time
my back is healing brilliantly, couldn't ask for a better result, still having to take it easy, which i wasn't always doing of course!
i've had loads to blog about really, had a wonderful, wonderful Be Rangerized weekend at Art Journey! fab peaople to work with, Louise & her team are angels and everything was organized till the last detail which was lucky for me because i was sooooo sick the night before our 3-day event, it wasn't even funny! i eventually got there and worked through it living on sportsdrink, lost likos i tell you! but it was worth it! so many happy people, all Rangerized wohaha!

but ok! it took me more than that to come and finally blog
and i hope you all have a seat!

two days ago i weny for a mammograph, one i had asked for myself, don't ask me why...
painful on any given day, us girls know that, mammo showed something, and ultrasound followed and there they found 4 lumps in my left breast, the lumps looked to be benign but the radiologist said she coud not be a 100% sure and wanted to do a punction for a biopsy right there and then but gave me the option of waiting 3 months to go back for another ultrasound instead but i sais no, just do the puntcion now! omg!!!! not something i wish on anyone.
yesterday i had to phone in for the results, so i did and they weren't there yet so doc was going to get back to me, one more hour of waiting and i felt sick with stress
she phoned and said she did not want to discuss anything on the phone, i needed to go to the hospital about an hour later, i wanted to know something so she said this is not news i can tell you just like this,n i need to see you face to face so we can discuss options and treatment
well my body just collapsed.
i luckily had my friend Curtis to drive me in because he was just on his way to my house, we go in and sit down and she says: you are not going to like what i am about to tell you but there is no other way of saying it, you have breast cancer...
my head was spinning
4 malignant tumours in left breast
once i m done crying she explains
they now need to check if there aren't more tumours in there, ones that are away from the group of four, check with a full body MRI if the cancer hasn't spread to other organs or bone
MRI is next Wednesday
next Friday i go in to discuss what was found
my options as she explained at the minute are:
best option: they find nothing more than the 4 tumours, if the tumours measure under 2cm a piece i get a breast saving surgery on the 20 of December( that's a day before my 43rd birthday), radiation to follow. my largest 2 tumours are now 1,8cm
next option: they find more tumours loose from the group of 4 then i get a breast amputation, radiation to follow
worst option: there is cancer elsewhere in my body: i did not even want to hear about that just yet so i don't know what will happen then

chemotherapy will depend on what they fnd in my lymphs or not, so still remains to be figured out.

there that is the deal! no beating around the bush on it. my cards have been dealt once again not in my favour to say the least.

my world has been turned upside down in the matter of 2 days, i can't begin to expalin how i feel, actually still pretty numb.

doc says my immune system has been attacked so hard by the suddeck and the meds and then heavy back surgery, it just provoked the cancer to show sooner, she reckons i would have gotten it somewhere down the line anyway, now it's just sooner than later.

you know what? i really don't think this is fair!!!! i breastfed all my children, i check my boobs every month! the gyno just checked them 5 weeks ago, there was nothing to be felt!
i just had this weirdest feeling i needed a mammo!!! this is so not fair! not fair!

my gp came by last night, gave me something to calm, don't know what but way stronger than valium that was for sure, i was so mellow, i've never used drugs but i felt pretty high and drunk last night, even giggling about this whole thing! meds have totally worn off though, believe me, i know where i'm at. it's not a nice place to be at!

why am i sharing all of this with you? for one i can't go through it alone and secondly, i know for a fact there are a lot of women who dread having mammo's, who postpone it! well DON'T!!!! are you listening???? go get it done! do it for me! do it for yourself mainly!!! just think about it! my tumours could not be felt from the outside, nothing to be seen, no indications what so ever! now, i don't want to scare you but please, better safe than sorry.

am i scared? well hell of course i am! one of my worst nightmare ever has been to lose a breast, it is just unthinkable to me, always has been! and here i am facing the possibility up close and personal.
all my friends are tellin me i'm strong, that i will get through this, and yes i am strong, i've proven that a few times too many already, kind of sick of having to prove it over and over again, i'm kind of tired maybe???
but they are right! no way am i letting this break me, i will get through it, i will get better, i have no choice, i have 5 kids and 2 of them are still little, i'm not a quitter and i won't quit on this one either.

i'm lucky to have lots of friends, loving kids and my friend Curtis who is being a rock in all of this, he is heaven sent! what a time to prove this so fresh and new relationship!!! we met at the end of September and just decided to give it a chance as a couple last Sunday!!!! hell of a way to test love!!!

right, what more is there to say?

love you all!

love & peace

Tanya

2010-09-16T13:33:00.002+02:00

hiya, i've been a bit quiet, i know, life just get's in the way sometimes...
update on my surgery: all is good!!! really good! op was clearly a success! okay i need to take it easy, still not doing housework and all that stuff but i am lot more mobile than before the op even considering my Suddeck
and i can drive again! short distances and not three times a day i have learned! my back is still very sore and i still feel a torn muscle in my back, yeah, i did that trying to get up in the first week i was home! just bad luck lol! it's healing surely but slowly or slowly but surely lol how ever you want to put it. so i'm glad i had it done!
give it more time and my back'll be brand new :))

i haven't been up to any art, no painting so far, i just haven't felt up to it strangely, i did get my biggest drawing pad out today and did a bit of drawing this morning but it tires me more than i understand... i guess my body and mind are in need of a break, a rest, i am tired, of a lot of things, contemplating life, maybe too much, i've had too much time on my hands, rethinking options due to doc telling me that the Suddeck in my foot might take another few years to heal, if it ever does... feel like i'm stuck in a void no going back and no future to plan.

of course i still do what i can for Ranger, managed to make some cool little canvases before my op! i'll need to get a good pic of them to post! Kars kept them for a while for marketing purposes but i got them back yesterday! i'll post them after the weekend if i don't forget. they were shown at the Kars tradeshow KKD and so many people thought Tim had made them and i was like hey!!! i made them lol!!! well anyway they loved them so that's cool!

well you know, thats all folks, short update but at least you know i'm still hanging around :)

off to take a nap!

have the best day!
love & peace xx

a week gone by

2010-08-22T18:12:00.004+02:00

well, re-reading my last post i must say things have changed alot! i am walking around, okay not far or anything, just into my garden and around the house but still! it's a huge improvement compared to last week!!

the stitches are out and that too is a big relief! what a difference it makes, especially for sitting, still hurts to sit but less every day!

i am pleased, for the first time i think this op was a good idea! , my foot is straight again, before my left foot twisted outwards and it was really painful along with the Suddeck that is in that foot anyway.

Suddeck is giving me alot more bother because of the pain signals going to my back but i'm coping with that, i'm okay.

boredom is my biggest problem, i miss painting and fiddeling around in my studio :((

i did do a little drawing, you know, lying around the whole day made me think of Frida Kahlo lol so i tried to draw while laying on my side! hard to do i tell you! an adventure seeing the rest of my day i watch tv grrrr i now know when to plant tulips, paint rooms, decorate, remove stains from dirty carpets,.... daytime tv sucks!!!

here's my Frida folk art doll :))

she's just in my Rehab Moleskine Sketchbook

not too bad concidering my circumstances!

Wednesday i'm off to see Paolo Nutini!

it'll be a trip! it's about an hour's drive, i'm not driving of course, a friend is taking me :)

we will have to stop a few times to let me walk around for 10minutes because i'm not allowed to sit so long in the car on one end, so we need to leave pretty early

and i'll be in a wheelchair at the concert.

i tried it yesyerday going to Ikea and it was okay, not much pain, but it's not about the pain, it's about the healing around the new titanium disc!

i'll be careful and won't start dancing or anything! i'm so happy to be going and i got the all clear from the doc just for the one time he said! after that a few days complete bedrest again.

i can live with that :))

i know alot of you want to know how i'm doing, i hope i haven't bored any other readers

i promise there will be more artsy stuff to show soon :))

hang in there with me if you can.

love & peace

tanya xx

post op update

2010-08-12T16:37:00.003+02:00

hi i'm back home!! well i got home on Monday but haven't had the enegry to write until today! it's had typing while laying on my side, two-finger typing :)
the op went well, i still feel my toes lol! seriously? the whole first week was hell, pain more than i would have imagined, second night my morphin pump packed in and was dripping onto my bed instead of into my arm! i was in total agony and cried the whole night until i felt the drip next to my head and called the nurse! it was too late! i was beyond finding comfort then and needed a muscle relaxant to calm my body down then mrs pain nurse came later that day and said: oh you had a good night! you only pumped morphin from 6am!!! i could have throttled her!!!
well anyway, on day three i was allowed to do some steps! yay for that! i felt human again! instead of feeling like a washed up whale!!!

im feeling better little by little, still hard to move, i have to get up in a certain way, no strength in my back muscles, can't turn my back what so ever but i guess that will get better when i start rehab half September..... i'm sick of lying down, sitting hurts too much, i can do that only for a few minutes at a time. i'm so scared i'll mess up the screws in my back! it just freaks me out they are there!!! i am now know as titanium lady for my friends lol titanium disc and plates screwed into my backbones nice huh! :s

im totally bored!!! i so want to paint or something but i need to be a good girl and rest for the first three weeks let all their handywork settle in my back and then start finding out what i can and can't do.
no household work for at least three months, not even peel patatoes!!! pffff i feel useless to be honest! luckily i have wonderful kids, inez & bart are helping me out loads and as from next week i will have a caretaker 4 hours a day to do all the mammy work around the house because then the littlies are back home.

at the same time i feel loved!! lots of friends came to the hospital, phonecalls! even from spain and seattle( thx diane xx) flowers all over my house :) my old lady neighbour came by this morning with beautiful flowers, she had so missed me she said, sooooo sweet!

ok, it was a post of complaining and frustration! i won't make an art of it lol!
wait till i get back in full swing! give me a few months!!! i have ideas and i'm jotting them down!!!

ok, i'm tired and my two fingers hurt haha so adios for now

love & peace!! and take care of that back! bend through your knees to pick things up :))

xxx

making the most of it!

2010-07-29T00:11:00.005+02:00

hey peeps, where to start? well, havent been making much art though i am in the middle of a painting at the moment, a beautiful angel inspired by my friend MP, she will also be the new owner of this painting and i showed her a half finished version of it today and she is in love with it and recognized herself in it so my mission is accomplished and that makes me happy :)

here the half finished angel

what else? well i'm making most of my month July seeing August will be one of getting back on my feet after the surgery!

talking of that! last week i found out there has been a change of plan!!! instead of just removing part of the damaged disc they are now going to take the disc away! and replace it with a titanium one wich also means i get metal plates and screws & bolts!

oweeee i wasn't expecting that and can't say i'm too happy either but that's where i stand so as usual i will go through whatever is on my path.

i plan on making my hospital stay as bright as possible! so i will be pretty in pink :)

i got all pink pj's, a pink dressing gown, slippers, undies, all pink of course! i'm taking my pink laptop, i've got pink towels and plan on getting a pink throw for my hospital bed :)) hey! might just brighten up the place while i'm there and it kind of takes my mind of the actual event.

but! before the 4 of August i still have a few plans :))

thursday: park concert with kids & friends

friday: my friend kaat is coming to catch up after her holiday and in the evening i am going to a trailer trash party bash! a birthday party under a bridge lol! and we have to dress the part too! i got some cool 'trashy' clothes last week and am looking forward to dressing up and seeing all my friend's clothes too

saturday: another birthday party but with normal clothes ;)

Sunday: going out for dinner with my friend kelly

Monday: going out for the day with my friend peter

Tuesday: hum i'd best stay home on tuesday :)) pack my bag and pay all the bills before i head of to hospital on wednesday

so you see, i'm keeping myself busy!!

and now off to bed! half past midnight & beauty sleep is calling :))

if i don't drop by before the op i wish you all sunshine filled days, cool nights and good health

love & peace, tanya xox

just some Summer pics

2010-07-18T23:02:00.007+02:00

ok here are some Summer impressions,

uploaded in random order

Rock Herk, the girls and me

we saw a really neat group called Auf Der Maur! heavy rock! so cool!!

(notice the blue crutch laying next to me? i was totally in pain by the end of the day but it was fun!!)

Kapermolen park concert

the bunch & me

Karin's birthday bbq

find me on the 2nd row, 4th pic :))

Esther's thank you party

the Marie-Antoinette painting i made for Sue

Angel i painted for Diane Radischat in Seattle

my cool new water lilly blooming after just 3 weeks in the fresh pond

owwww my 2 youngest kiddies Estée & Robin

Valencia!!!

this man was selling all the important fiesta goods for the world cup final Spain-Netherlands

it was so cool when Spain won! fiesta and fireworks everywhere!!

i loved these fans, i never got around to buying one!!

Valencia, some sightseeing

one of the domes inside Valencia Cathedral

Valencia, boulevards

Valencia train station

Sue & me having cocktails

my henna tatoo, i got a 2nd gekko put on later

me pretending the tatoo hurt :))

painting a 'jule' ( little doll in kindergarden here in belgium) for my friend's son Hannes, he needed to take Jule (the doll!!) a present at the end of the schoolyear so aunty tanya had the honour :))

as you see he was really happy and his teacher had trouble getting it off him lol

Robin in the pool

Estéé
ok, that was it until now :)

my Summer will be cut short through the surgery on my back on 4th of August so i'm having as much fun as i can before then

have a super sunshine filled day!!!

love & peace

tanya xx

time flies!!

2010-07-16T16:13:00.003+02:00

it has been ages since i have written on my blog, i can't say it's because i haven't had the time :) and it's not because i haven't got anything to say or to show... just call me lazy lol!!!

seriously, i've just been taking a break, two sunshine filled weeks in Spain with my friend Sue and her husband Colin, and adventure at times! starting with Sue having a flat tyre on the way to the airport to pick me up! luckily i had a friendly man sitting next to me on the plane, we had been chatting the whole flight, he heard about me having to wait a few hours so he suggested i hitch a ride with him and his two teenagers :)) lucky me! Sue got home hours!!!! later.

then i did my back in! totally! just by leaning over the bathtub to rince my hair, omg!!! i thought i would have to call the inssurance to let me go home! but it subsided a little, enough to still enjoy my holiday, on crutch most of the time but hey!?

We visited Valencia, i loved that! i'll show some pics in my next post, i have my foot up at the moment and don't want to get up to get the SD card from my camera :))

oh and of course i had a few paints and brushes with me so i made a little painting for Sue, pic is still on my camera so that's for the next post

some pics i do have:

this is the angel i painted for Diane Radichat in Seattle

(we were at Ranger together)

Tanya & Sue having cocktails :)

my gekko tatoo

me getting the tatoo!!! painful??? well no!!! i was faking! it's only henna lol!

i'm kind of tired!! went to a park concert last night, always fun because most of my friends are there too and in the Summer there is a concert every Thursday! so next week i'm taking the kiddies, there is so much for them to do there, it'll be fun!

today i picked the kiddies up from their two week stay at their dad, so glad to have them home again :))

tomorrow we are going to ROCK HERK, a rock festival not too far from here, loads of my friends are going too so it'll be great!!

Wednesday i'm off to my friend Esther's birthday BBQ

lol no wonder i'm tired huh?? but Summer is good for meeting up with friends and having loads of fun i think! pain or no pain :)) no use lying around all the time huh!

i have a few commisioned paintings to start but for now i'm going to just keep my feet up and have a rest with a good book

till next time :)

love & peace

tanya xx

Paolo Nutini - What a Wonderful World

2010-06-27T23:10:00.000+02:00

i love Paolo's version of this great song!!

i'm lucky to be going to see him 25th of August!! i hope i'll be okay because i have back surgery planned for 4th of August, soooo not looking forward to that at all but it looks like i have no choice!! My eldest daughter is coming to help me out.

i had a full home security system intalled in the house! there were a few burglaries in the area a week ago and not that i am scared but it feels safer sleeping with the alarm on believe me.

i'm off to spain for two weeks in a couple of days for some fun, sun and my friend Sue!! :)) but first TWILIGHT NIGHT with my friend MP :)) 3 films in a row and meeting some of the actors, sadly not 'edward' lol.

happy Summer to you all, i might pass by my blog over the Summer but i am not making any promises :)

love & peace xxx tanya

hi! hi!

2010-06-20T23:51:00.003+02:00

hiya all, just a really quick hello, no art to show, life has been way to busy... no rest for the wicked :)
i just wanted to let you know i've added a new app :)) a few of my favourite songs, click on 'video' to see Jason Mraz or the ador-able (uhummm) Paolo Nutini!!!!
I am a lucky lucky girl! i've got a ticket to see Paolo in August, happy happy!!!

ok if i make something to show before i head off for Spain i'll blog about it, if not! see you all after my holiday :))

oh and as a huge Twilight fan i'll be going to the Twilight Night marathon before my holiday, three full films in a row and seeing some of the actors!! i mean come on!!! cool or not??!!
ok i'm off to bed, pretty late in my part of the world.... listen to my music! if it gets on your nerves while reading my blog just turn it off :))
love & peace, tanya xxx happy Summer!!!

Prince Charming...

2010-06-02T12:45:00.003+02:00

Prince Charming, as i see him... not that i am in any way waiting on a Prince Charming lol, i just thought it would be cool to give him a go since i am doing another Suzi class :)) and need to practice side view faces! so here is my first ever, i 'm not drawn to side views so much because i get less eye to play with and for me it's all about the eyes in my faces but having tried this i probably will do a few more and then practice some 3/4 views too, always something new to learn and that is what i love about drawing and painting!and then there i this painting 'Passion' commisioned by my friend Esther, a beautiful redhead herself so she loves my girls & angels

this one is no angel, seeing the text she wanted put on was a touch sassy lol i figured it was best to make her a goddess instead :))

ok, short post, the weather is way too nice to be sitting in and the sun too bright to take the laptop out lol

so have a brilliant day & whatever you are up too, i hope you are having fun!!

talk soon!

love & peace

tanya xx

time to paint...

2010-05-27T13:23:00.004+02:00

hi all, as usual life has been busy but we have had quite a bit of sunshine out here in the countryside, over the weekend we had temps up to 32 °C and that my dears is really hot for May!! however yesterday it rained all day and the temps dropped to 10°C and that was a huge difference and i even had to throw some logs onto the fireplace again but no complaints because today the sun is back out to play and the garden was actually pretty grateful for the rain..

but enough about the weather lol!!

i've had time to paint, mostly outside in the sun which proved a little difficult with my acrylic paint drying really quick even when pulled into the shade! but i have now bought a retarder and i'm hoping that will help the open time while i paint. anyway, here is my lastest finished painting
'SOLICE'

the text on her dress is from a my South african friend Marc Volker, he is a bit of a poet most of the time, just never get into football issues with him lol! omg he can rave on about it, i think he drives his wife Nicolette nuts with it.

i really like this text of his so i asked permission to use it and seeing he loves my art he said yes straight away and is pretty proud i used it so we are both happy :)

my insperation for the wings i found in the street artists in Barcelona

i used lots of golden mica flakes, i just love them!

i beeswaxed the whole painting, even her face, i stamped into the beeswax in the bottom right corner and added perfect pearls to it, i mainly used Golden fluid acrylics, Steward Gill Alchemy paint (colour fusion) for the eyes because i simply love the shimmer they give and i used some Steward Gill Colourise paints on the face and Golden fiber paste for her hair...

so there you have some of my mixed media secrets :)

at the moment i am working on a commisioned painting for a beautiful redhead friend, i will show once finished

have a great day and i hope the sun is shining where you are

love & peace

tanya xx

food for thought

2010-05-15T03:12:00.006+02:00

i've been inking & painting & embossing metal, sanding and scratching... laying the last hand om my next workshop, i'll post pics when i'm totally done

i have had no time to paint and yet i feel i should have, i need to paint to orden my feelings and impressions... otherwise thet stick with me and start living a life of their own, the only way i can stay strong and not let feelings or pain take over me is by painting them away, maybe not away but giving myself a chance to put them into perspective. most people class me a a strong woman, i have been through a few ordeals in this life and yet appear to be happy and optimistic and i am! i am strong and optimistic on most days, but like all of us i do get down, i do have feelings to cope with, the pain take over on some occasions, now i am in no way complaining here! don't get me wrong! i have a super beautiful life, i am happy...

but to be honest i made it easy on myself in a way, i stayed away from social life, i never tried to make new friends where i live, i have been happy enough to meet people through teaching and it was enough for me. Over the last few months i have been out and about more, i felt it was time to come out of my hiding place, not that i was really hiding, i was just enjoying the peace of my soltitude. I live in a wonderful place, surrounded by the most beautiful nature that makes me intensely happy on any given day, i have a strong connection with nature, maybe more than with people, i don't have many close friends, by choice.

but i have been out and about and am glad i have but at the same time so many new impressions are coming my way and i am getting to know myself all over again, how i react, when i feel comfortable or not, ... new lessons, all over again, challenging and sometimes tiring but i am learning things about myself or recognizing things i already knew. and i get into the funny situation that people i meet ask if i am married or single, have i got kids? uh yes 5! lol then comes the shocked look on their faces most of the time... i get all kinds of responses, some think it is amazing i have five, they think i look too young to have five, three of them being adult! funny is that in a pub sometimes when i tell a man about my five kids i see the scared look on their faces ;) and most of them suddenly need the toilet haha! good way of getting rid of them really... :)

also i still am way more reserved or timid than some other women i see who go straight into action when they see a man they fancy, i see them getting really close, putting on sexy eyes and smiles and giggles and even to the extent of almost throwing themselves at a man the very first night they meet... i'm not judging! in no way am i judging, i'm just stating that i am incapable of acting like that, i have never ever made a first move... i was actually talking about that to someone the other day and that person said it roots from fear of rejection... that made me think... maybe that is true but i have no idea! i think it is just not appropriate (for myself) to act in such a way and i never will... do i let chances slip? i don't think so because really if a man falls for such behavior then fine... but no thanks lol!! i like who i am and if that makes me a little gray sparrow amongst colourful birds then so be it... you might find this a strange conversation lol but it is just a pick of one of the new impressions that have been coming my way, nothing more to it really.

the sun is out today but i have some more work to do before i can actually go out to sit in it, i did have my morning coffee in the garden and again was amazed by the amount of birds that are in my garden (including a whole bunch of beautiful sparrows :)), i saw buds on my lavander, yay i love love love the scent of lavender so i cant wait for the flowers. the tadpoles are becoming very active in the pond!!! soon i'll have hundreds of tiny toads hopping on my terras, i'm not too fond of that to tell the truth, it looks like some plague out of the bible and some of them even commit suicide by hopping into the kitchen and bathroom! ever had tiny toads hopping around you while sitting on the loo??? aaaarrgggg!

anyway, heading off to get some stuff done that is really long over due but life is busy and the days are way too short... i'll get it done and posted today! my mission!!

hope you all have a wonderful day wherever you are

love & peace,

and i do lay stress on the peace, inner peace is something i have found to be essential

tanya xx

Happy Mother's Day

2010-05-09T11:29:00.004+02:00

Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful mums.

My mother's day so far has consisted of sleeping in because the littlies are at their dad, it is his weekend to have them so i will see them later today when i pick them up.

So sleeping in was my luxury though i would have prefered to have kiddies jumping on my bed bringing me burned toast and weak coffee and dandilions from the garden :)

however my 20y old son did make me (half burned) toast and scrambled eggs and brought it out into the garden without even a mumble of happy mother's day haha and then went off inside to watch a recorded film from last night... typical my son lol!

so again peace and quiet...

except for my little buddy blackbird who i have named George :)

my sweet son did give me a gift certificate for new sunglasses so yesterday we had a nice day in the city, choosing some pretty cool sunglasses that i will have by the end of next week, lunch out in the sun, well not so much sun but it was nice enough.

I'm not one for expecting gifts for Mother's day, whenever my kids used to aks what i wanted i always replied that it would be fantastic if they would for one day not fight or make a mess and make me a cup of tea without me asking for it... i always got the tea!

motherhood is quiet a ride, one that i have learned lots from, with five kids there is a lesson every day! my hardest lesson has been to let go... my teenage daughter taught me how to do that, in not such a soft way (some of you will remember she ran away from home in feb 2009 and is now living with her father) it hurt like hell and on some days it still does... but i have learned to let it go as much as i can, she is nearly adult now, 18 in June.

My own mother died last year in September and that too was a hard thing to deal with in different ways than most of you would expect.

She died at the age of 59 after a seven year struggle with Alhzeimers

we never had a connection, i only met her for the first time as a teenager so it was not the average mourning journey i went through...

this morning sitting out in the garden, for the very first time in my life i felt she might just be watching over me after all and it made me cry and then i started to miss my runaway teen and that made me cry and then George started singing and that made me smile and cry... and then the song hallelujah came on my ipod and ok... you get the picture.

****************

i went to a really cool party on Friday night.... oh i got home at 3.30am after playing taxi for a sad soul who's car had broke down ;)

i met so many cool, beautiful, crazy people, we laughed so much and omg you don't want to knows ome of the convo's we had, hilarious believe me!!

so happy Esther invited me :))

and i made her a little present because the very first time we met she fell in love with my framed collage necklace and insantly dived into my cleavage lol... she is like that!

(here is what i made for her, not so good pics but it is hard with the glass that reflects)

she pretty much squeeled with delight and we immediatly fitted the chain to fit and then she had to change her earrings because they didn't match lol ... and every one just had to admire it! she gave them no choice lol!!

ah well i'm going to let you all have a wonderful day and i'm going to continue to relax out in the sun, today the sun seems to have come back to play and i am not complaining!!!

love & peace

tanya xx

what makes you happy...

2010-05-06T22:16:00.004+02:00

what truly makes you happy? my list is long!!! of course my children or on the list of what makes me happy, i find that pretty obvious...

i was pleased and suprized of the amount of small things on my list...

the blackbird singing in my garden made me intensly happy this morning! honestly i sat in the garden smoking a sigarette (that is a different story!!) and saw mister blackbird hopping around, he has been my friend for a few weeks now and he is loud i tell you! last year he seemed to get on my nerves a little but this year his song seems so beautiful! i actually go sit out in the garden just to see him. so this morning there he was hopping around from tree to bush to the pond (he is an active little fella) singing his heart out, i imagine him doing that especially for me of course, after all he seems to be my new companion. And then comes mrs blackbird, hopping along... and it made me smile to see my little companion having a girlfriend... yeah, things like this make me happy and not just for a moment... it lingers... i take the feeling back inside with me, it makes my heart sing happy songs and makes my pain lighter and less important and again that is on my list of what makes me happy!

my dog rolling around in the grass like a little lunatic

a fresh hot cup of tea

the sun on my face

sitting outside to paint

sitting inside to paint

biting into a juicy apple

drinking hot chocolate in bed

red paint (well all paint but red is my fav!)

my new oil pastels

buying new shoes for my kids

raspberry sorbet

having coffee with friends

having wine with friends

listening to all the cool music on my pink ipod

watching the kids play out in the garden

drawing in my art journal

my friend Diane in Seattle who says hi every single day

discovering new music

silence... for a long time silence was so loud!!! it brought discomforting thoughts and fears and worries. now silence is simply silent, peaceful and nice.

my list is so much longer... and that too makes me happy.

i hope you all have a wonderful day
love & peace
tanya x

Love Yourself Today

2010-04-26T19:36:00.007+02:00

(Saturday morning 7am)

we have been having the most glorious weather out here, the blossom is coming to full force and so are the number of tourists , almost enough for me to escape it all! omg!!! the amount of bikers! yeah bikers Harleys i mean... all tough dudes coming to see the blossom lol how cute!!! bikers, cyclists, cars, bussssssessss even, all through our tiny little village, a bit of a pain when you are out in the garden having what you thought was going to be a quiet sit down lol!!!

yesterday i went to my beautiful friend in Aalst to have a nice quiet sit down and lunch out in the garden : ) a super de luxe salade, wine and the best strawberries evvvva!! fresh from our countryside. i even got a bit of a tan, well don't expect too much of my tans lol, this British skin of mine does not tan all that well... but it was a good good day...

one day that felt like two weeks holiday.

Saturday i had the honour to "Rangerize" a bunch of nice ladies, they were rockstars, they inked and stamped and combined techniques like pros! so so proud of them! i never took pics but i'm sure i will get my hands on some to share later!

days like these make me happy, make the never ending pain bearable... eventhough i have to pay for it 10 times over today i don't care!

Love Yourself Today, this is the name of my lastest Mixed Media Painting

she proved to be a bit of a pain in the butt lol! oh so many things went wrong on this one, i have no idea why! i think she was meant to be and exercise in patience and i had to learn to love her the way she turned out and i do! she maybe a bit of a dark spirited lady but she has the right message and her energy feels more than okay.
she is a 15X30cm painting on wood

i used lots ofGolden Fluid Acrylics, glass bead paste, modeling paste, gold mica flakes, Steward Gill paints, Tim Holtz stamps, Ranger inks, Distress powder.

This week... i plan on finishing off a few class samples, i have a scrap class and i'm due in hospital again for my last nasty, hateful stupid,

paintful, not-doing- much-for-me injection!!!

soooo not looking forward to that!

anyway beautiful people!! i wish you all a great week filled with all nice things

love & peace!!!!

tanya x

how are you all doing?

2010-04-20T16:39:00.006+02:00

life has been moving on, i really should try and blog more often but the days just seem so short :)

i'm not going to talk much about the pain i'm in, it is just ongoing and therefore boring the life out of you all!

so what have i been up to? well i went along to a photo shoot with my friends Daisy ( model) and Paul (photographer) see some pics of Daisy here. it was fun especially because i will be helping to make some cool props for future shoots and some jewellery and beaded clothing ( when am i going to do all that?)

here is a pic i took of the glam life of models in the middle of a field, waiting for the set to be finished... i was sitting under an apple tree drawing in my journal, taking it all in, it was diff to my usually activities but fun! i must admit that a certain person was right to drag me along eventhough i had just come out of hospital!!!

the first ice creams have been approved by my little ones! it was such nice weather last weekend that i took them to the playground...

they appear to be wearing matching clothes lol! that was not on purpose

further more i have been busy with upcoming workshops, i went to a Donna Downey workshop in Belgium, it was really nice meeting her and her wonderful husband, it was worth the drive and the long day... and fof any of you who might be wondering... i do take that hat off sometimes :)

i am working on a few paintings at the same time but non of them are finished so not much art top show other than this quick little mixed media canvas i made for norah, my friend's 5 year old daughter! it is a quick job, done while she was waiting and acoording to her orders... huh wishes!!! my my !! she knows what she wants and she loves pink!!!

last but not least i wouls like you to go check out my blog friend Al Hernandez, he has been a fan of my blog for some time now and i have always enjoyed his reply.

i have added him to my blogroll so you can go visit his blog whenever you like;

have a nice day or evening depending where you are in the world... i'm off to start dinner

take care! love & peace

oh and if you are a facebooker then you might enjoy adding my fanpage to your list! just search for rusty angel Art and you will find me there, thanks xx

where does time go??

2010-04-07T13:26:00.004+02:00

it might be just me but i feel like this year is moving on at high speed, some how it is almost half of April without me realizing...

due to the hernia, which is causing me more pain and grief than i care to talk about, i haven't been up to much, i did work on this painting though, a work that took about two weeks for me to finish, i had to learn to paint at my easle sitting down, not the easiest thing with this 54X107 cm painting!!

Absolem Butterfly Girl paintingthis beautiful butterfly that a friend gave me after the Alice in Wonderland film, was my inspiration

it was quite a journey, a new adventure actually! first i painted my girl on wood as i usually do, this time i painted a bit smaller than i am used too and that proved a bit tricky for me to do details but it didn't matter reaaly, i painted on 15X30 and then i had it scanned at the photographer, Paul Croes in Hasselt, he printed it on to canvas with the Epson fine art printer. a really nice starting point for me to finish off my art on this huge size!

the nice thing is that i had the finished piece photographed in the studio so now i can sell prints on canvas that i can further embellish if i please, this way i can make more people happy withmy painting at a lower cost. the original is no longer available.

i have already had the draft version printed again, flipped horizontally so she is now facing the opposite direction, this one i will be painting in very different colours, a totally different butterfly girl! i wil show once finished.

ok that is enoigh blogging for me, my back is aching like razy so i better take the lie-down

hope you are all enjoying Spring! here in the countryside the first blossoms are starting to show, hopefully the weather will stay nice and then we will have the full white burst of the apple, pear and cherry trees! it is a wonderful sight!! tourist come from all over to visit our area then.

talk to you again soon!

love & peace
tanya

beautiful times

2010-03-23T08:39:00.003+01:00

isn't it just wonderful when Spring makes it's enterance? not that i ever complained about Winter, not like 99% of the people i know lol, i don't mind Winter, i love snow, ok, driving in snow and on icey roads not so much but it's part of it and can't be changed ... so why complain?

anyway, Winter seems to behind us and Spring has made it's enterance, i see purple sticking up out of the soil, the goldfish in the pond are pretty active and before long there will be thousands of tadpoles appearing.

Even my doggy knows it's Spring, he ran away last week, off to find himself a woman jack russell lol! he had no luck!!!! i found him first and my neighbour found the new tiny gap he managed to find to escape the garden ... it's fixed!

My last two orchids are in bloom again, last year i must have brought home an orchid with a desease, (white sticky fluffy bugs!!!) i did all i could to save my 18 orchids but sadly i only managed to save two and yes!!!! they are blooming, i am over the moon! like a proud mommy :)

i've been painting:

this one is on canvas, i hardly ever work on canvas because i need to work gentle and i'm not such a gentle worker :) i love to rub, scratch, scrub,... not so gentle!

This one is called Alice's Angel and was inspired by what other that Alice in Wonderland! i went to see the film in 3D, i hate those stupid little glasses over my own glasses, they just don't fit!!

but the film i liked very much! i loved this version, Tim Burton doesn't usually appeal to me that much but Alice was great!

The saying on it i already used before but i like it and i like opening doors and windows...

now i am working on a really small piece 6X12inch and there are plans to make her big!!! i will show and tell once it is done.

my foot is bad! terrible even, i wish wish wish i could say otherwise! i dream of the day i can tell you all my foot is healed and i can jump and dance like the crazy lunatic i am ...

but due to the beautiful L4 L5 hernia i have the nerves to my left leg and foot are even worse off than they already were, i mean come onnnnnn!!!! f*!!!!

i hope the epidural treatment next week helps some.

my left foot is now starting to turn inwards, the muscles aren't getting the correct information and are giving up on me :(( no matter how hard i try my foot will not stay flat, doc says if it gets any worse i will have to wear a brace to correct my foot position, this really made me want to cry...

but!!!! life is beautiful, there is more to it than my stupid foot!!!

i am enjoying all that can and have loads to be grateful for.

on the bright side: due to the pain i haven't been able to eat well so i am losing weight!

hey!!! losing weight is a good thing :))

see always a silver lining!!! always!!!!!

have a great day! i' m off to paint and sing, i can't dance but i can softly headbang to Metallica wohaha!!! Spring is in the air!!!

all my doors are open!!

xxx

love & peace

Spring is in the Air!!

2010-03-17T15:32:00.003+01:00

too often i start with: i have not dropped off the planet...

so today i will start with:

Spring is in the Air!!!

it really is!! the Sun is shining, my little girl is playing outside,

i love it when they get some fresh air.

let's see, what have i been up to since last post?

hernia!! still causing proper pain! doc is sending me to hospital for epidural injections!! i'm like: huhhh really??? that sounds pretty uncomfortable... but it is the next step in trying to prevent surgery on my back. so i have to try!

however i keep moving about, living life as full as i possibly can.

last weekend a friend took me to a collage art showing of a friend of his. it was fun, her work was sassy and true british punk style. i will see if she has a website.

i met quite a few people and contacts, some where instantly in love with the soldered pendant i was wearing and now i guess i better get started on making a few new ones.

last night i went to see Alice in Wonderland, it was great, i loved the film, the 3D gave it such a magical feel, the insects flying around your head lol, i even pulled away a few times.

Tim Burton did good on this one, the darkness was not too much for me.

I especially liked the Caterpillar Absolem, loved that he turned into a beautiful blue butterfly at the end . but Johnny Depp was fab too! i mean he really was the Mad Hatter!

after the film a friend gave me a blue butterfly! a real one, huge, sooooo beautiful... i have given it a safe place where i can look at it. such a sweet gesture...

I've been painting, firstly on the two little paintings that are being sent off to Sandra and Sheri, they are nearly done, i'm on to the little details...

ok! i would like you to meet a friend of mine, Paul Croes, he is a wonderful photographer that i will be working with pretty soon, he is the first photographer that i've known who understands my paintings and how to catch all their details, he appreciates my art and knows how to present it.

you can check out his website he is still working on it so be sure to go back regulary.

I have a few plans up my sleeve...

This little Angel is my latset, and she has already found a new home to watch over.

My first BLUE Angel, i've used blue before but not so light, it was challenging but she turned out really nice, the red does go with the light blue, i like the match actually...

so, despite all the pain i am in i manage to keep painting, art does save!!!!

so! i am off to paint... have a great day, enjoy the Sunshine if you get the chance!

Iwasn't sick of the snow and colf like everyone els i know lol but i am happy the temperature is rising and the flowers are shyly popping up in the garden!

oh and my orchids are blooming again, for me that is pure joy!!

love & peace

xxx

random talk

2010-03-01T15:37:00.005+01:00

i've been meaning to blog for a few days now but always something gets in the way but here i am for some random chat.

i've been painting! as i promised myself, i would take some time just to paint...

i painted an angel for myself >>>>

then one i made specially for my dear friend who needed a little motivation

( i never took a picture)

and the third i was asked to paint as a present for my friend's mother.

i have learned that i really do paint from my heart and because this one was for a special person's special person i wanted it te be perfect, now there lies a loophole!!! the harder i tried to get het perfect the more i seemed te mess her up, i started somewhat five times i reckon!! i hardly ever do that. i really had to go back to painting and drawing from my heart and not trying to make her like it so much. She has seen my art and likes it! why try so hard sometimes?? lessons learned i tell you lol!!

so i am grateful for doing this painting, i learned alot and i was able to let go in the end

and i showed my friend some pics

and he loves it

and says his mum is going to be over the moon with it.

makes me happy.

and i showed both paintings to Suzi Blu, my mentor, without a doubt

and she loves loves loves them

(big smile)

------------------

but now!!!! i am in agony!! the thing that has been preventing me from sitting up to blog is my

Discus Hernia

yay!!!! on top of the battl against the Sudeck in my foot and leg i now am the proud owner of a hernia L4-L5 and it is a beauty! perfectly in the middle of the disk! :)

my doc says i do things right!

i haven't been able to do anything this last week

but today it seems like the meds the nurse comes and injects everyday are kicking in and doing me some good

not that i will be doing any running around but at least i can sit up long enough to write my blog, a girl's gotta be happy with what she's got i say!!!

all in all it is frustrating as hell but th bright side is....

well i'll find a bright side later, i'm sure ...

-------------------

i've got two little paintings i was working on before the hernia, maybe i'll try and finish them a little later so that i can post them off to their new owners,

one is travelling all the way to Arizona to a happy black cat :)!

ok that is enough blogging for me, gotta go lie down, ouwch meds are crap after all lol!

i'll be back soon

love you all

xxx

oh and of course i did NOT check for typos :)

oweeee!!!

2010-02-17T17:41:00.003+01:00

yesterday Lisa sent me a mail letting me know i had won a prize in her wonderful OWOH giveaway, honsetly i had never heard of it and commented on her blog not even thinking of winning anything, i just simply love her stuff! but see, as it happens i am the lucky winner of some of her beautiful doll parts! i am totally over the moon with this and can't wait for them to cross the big pond all the way from New Jersey!!

and... i just saw i have 50 followers!!! how lovely it is that so many of you think my random art and chit chat are worthy of following! thank you all so much, so sweet!

as said in prev post, i am having an easy week, no cooking has been done so far! pizza, Mc Donalds,... hihi! so proud of myself!!!! :))

i actually should finish the two little paintings i promised certain winners lol! i will i will!

and now a bit of advertising!!!!

Saturday 27 February Hobbyfarm will be hosting a super cool Ranger

educator :) with a steaming hot workshop

"Grungepaper-Patch-Art-Work"

literally a patchwork 2OX2Ocm of all kinds of techniques on Grungepaper finished off with selfmade UTEE embellishments, some metal embossed pieces and last but not least some of Tim's metal embellishments, all this framed in a 30X30cm frame. a workshop you don't want to miss if you are on our side of the world! see you there!

contact Hobbyfarm for all details

time to take it easy

2010-02-15T20:41:00.006+01:00

hiya friends, i have been so busy these last few weeks,

hardly time to breathe it seems and i do actually feel pretty tired yet happy!!

don't get me wrong, i have been having a blast! always time to have a few laughs!

My friend Sue came to visit, it was a shame is was so busy, i feel like i should have more free time to share but it was a bit hectic making samples with Tim's new stamps for a promotion magazine, getting ready for demos and life in general with the kids.

Next time she comes we will plan it in a more peaceful week lol!

(it took Sue about 3 shots to get this crazy pic of me! geeee thanks Sue! lol)

I got to work side by side with Tim Holtz, need i say that kinda made me happy? owww i admit i was over the moon! i got to chat with him off and on all day, shared my heattool lol, got to get my hands on some of his cool new embellishments and paper and even went home with all his demo products, i'm talking the new Distress Inks, all 12!!! the new colours perfect pearls and all other powders and paints he had his hands on in Germany and The Netherlands lol! i am happy happy, noooo i am not a Tim grouppie, where did you get that idea??

(I love this cool pic of Tim, myself and mario!!)

(mario at my side! kind looks like i have a fan! lol he is so sweet!

oww and notice how Sue managed to get a cool effect on my face? lol) ( me, pouring UTEE like a pro! see the concentration on my face? ahhh!)

some of my sample pieces for the promotion magazine for Tim's newest stamps! i love them!

and the new Distress Inks are all FAB FAB FAB colours!!! believe me when i say you won't be able to choose! you will want them all, they are the best yet, my opinion that is :)

anyyway! this week is more peaceful, the kiddies are at their dad for the week so i will sleep in tomorrow morning! yay!!!! and i'll do some painting this week, i haven't painted in a month or so, except for my livingroom but that is really not the same!!! no no! i want to paint a pretty angel and just chill out with some music and enjoy the free time i am treating myself too.

hope you are all doing well, i have been reading your blogs!

ow and today i noticed i have 48 followers! kinda coooool! lol

take care xxx

busy and un-organized

2010-01-27T11:32:00.002+01:00

ok my lovely friends, i am here, i might not be commenting on your blogs ( i am having trouble commenting on some, kate? i can't post) i have just taken the time to catch up on all your blogs, kate, sue, mike, patti,..... i am amazed at what some of you all have been up to since the year started.

i have been a little disorganized, my son Bart had a car accident on January 5 and has been home since, concussion and a bit of a whiplash and at first it seemd to be healing well but he is still having severe headaches and is off work for at least another three weeks, now do i need to tell you what it is with a sick man around the house (he is 20) ????? he is bored, he wants attention, he talks to me alot!!!! lol i love him to bits but i am not used to having someone around full-time! i love my alone-time during the day and then the chaotic evenings filled with family life! beautiful combo for this artsy mammy!

still no running hot water for the bathroom, a big big bummer that is and really getting on my nerves but i will get it sorted.

oh and Kate dear, i am doing the 365 day challenge, i will post when the month is over.

working on a few cool ideas, can't say much just yet but i am really excited and working on them behind the scenes of everyday life.

Sue, see you next week my love!!!! yayyyy! plz send me tthose flight times again cos they got lost in all my mail and i will keep them on my blackberry this time!
yes i entered the Blackberry era!!! and am loving it!!! it is great to have that little handy thing, emails, sms, chat, facebook, all at hand anywhere and everywhere, unless i choose to switch it off lol, and i do sometimes. never thought it would happen but i am a gadget girl!!! good thing my son shows me how to use it though lol!!!

ok off to to a little arts & crafts, i'm way behind on what i want to get done today

love you all xxx

quick post

2010-01-24T00:37:00.002+01:00

hiya all, just a really quick post to let you all know i am still around, i've been getting mails asking if i am okay... i am! well, i do have the worst cold ever and a really sore throat so i do feel a little sorry for myself lol!

Paris was great! i loved quartier Latin and especially the cosmopolitans i had in a great little piano bar.
i met up with Heidi Swapp and Wendy from My Tattered Angels, cool cool stuff! new possibilities!!

I am filled to the brim with ideas, i have managed to jot most of them down, some of them will be seeing light in 2010, more when the time is right! some of them are totally new and exciting and ahhhh can't say more!

I am happy to say that i spoke to my daughter Debby today on msn! over the moon on this! happy happy mum! some of you will know how sad i have been.

My good friend Sue will be coming soon! thrilled about her visiting us and our little trip to the Netherlands.

oww that's all folks, i should be in bed and this cold is blocking my head lol

take care all xxxx

Happy New Year

2010-01-04T16:49:00.006+01:00

Happy New Year!!! i'm a few days late but i'm really not into the whole new year thing, but i have used this new decennia and full and blue moon to set some changes into motion.

I started using the name Pretty Things about 8 years ago, my brother was starting up my website and he needed to typ in a name but i had never thought about it and just quickly said Pretty Things, thinking i might change it later. as it happened, Pretty Things turned out to be a cool name that people liked and after a few years i added on the 'life is filled with....', i can't remember why but it just kind of happened one day.

now i am not in the same place as 8 years ago, alot has hapened in my life! i mean ALOT! not all god but not all bad.

my art is changing, i am moving in different directions and sooooo i wanted to change a few things. i want to start and Etsy store, not right now but i have reserved my name:

{Rusty Angel Art}

so i added it on with my blog title. where does this name come from? well, i was born op North of England, Hexham to be more specific, raised in Throckley, Newcastle. we have a huge piece of art up there (in Gateshead) called the Angel of the North aka the rusty angel seeing it actually is all rusty now.

so i wanted to link to my roots and seeing that i love angels, paint angels due to the lovely Suzi Blu (best class ever!!!), know all about rusty things like rusty faith for one lol... don'task, i'm working on it

i like the new name and i think it suits me.

i am going to keep "life is filled with pretty things" on though seeing that i do really think my life is filled with lots of pretty, beautiful, wonderful things.

so 2010 is getting into swing! hope you are all well and keeping to those resolutions you might have made lol! i never make them.

xxx

winner birthday draw

2009-12-21T12:37:00.003+01:00

today is my birthday so as promised, i put all the names of my wonderful followers into a pot closed my eyes

pulled out one name

LBSC is short for... little black scrap cat aka Sherri!!!

Sherri i hope you are pleased,

send me your address and you will be recieving a little painting of mine soon, i will make one escpecially for you, i like to feel who i am painting for and with you that won't be a problem.

ok folks that was it.

all have a wonderful Christmas!

xxx

sticky back canvas flower

2009-12-18T21:20:00.004+01:00

remember my flower on tag 12?

made with sticky back canvas instead of Grungepaper? well, i showed it to Claudine (Hellmuth) and she loved it, she is so sweet! so i am getting another link in her next linky shout. and some of you have asked for a tutorial!!! i will be doing one soon, very soon, promise! i've got to finish translating tim's tags first, he was so sweet to give me permission to do so for my Belgian readers who would love to understand every singlel detail seeing that google translater does some funny things to the language at times :)

i got all the goodiebags out the door, hope they have arrived, UK ones might take a few days.

my painmeds got upped again, yes, again! my foot is proving to be very stuborn.

got alllll my Xmas shopping done today, yes that hurt my foot loads but hey it had to be done! and it is, i am proud to say that all is wrapped and sitting under the tree,

big sigh of relief going on here!

i am not happy when it comes to showering! i can't! i have no hot water, the boiler has given upon us and it seems it going to be a very difficult call in getting it fixed or replaced, really hard when you have little kids and especially a six year old with waistlong hair!

try washing that in the kitchen sink!

it's a bummer! all i can say!

see these tatoos? i love them! i want them! smaller, lots smaller! closer together and in a hidden place, hip or something. don't know if i am getting them lol! but i want to! :)

what else have i got to tell?

oh my birthday is sooooon so if you are not yet a follower to my blog then maybe you want to become one before Monday! because on my birthday, which is huuuhhh... on Monday lol i will be giving one lucky follower a present.

have a great weekend and if you have kids you will know that Christmas holiday has started, school reports were handed over to mammy today, they were good, proud of my kids, always, no matter what, but yeah they did well, cool!

right, enough chatting!

have a great weekend

xxx

yes! here they are! tag 11 & 12 of Xmas

2009-12-15T14:20:00.008+01:00

still feeling a bit under the weather but i managed to get these two finished. working in my living room where it is nice warm and i didn't want to drag all my supplies there so my last two tags have the same colour scheme lol... just so you know why.

tag 11!

of couse i had to improvise on the button but i wanted to make it look a bit like it cos i like the concept of the covered brads!!! so i covered a button with stickyback

canvas, imitating the pattern Tim used, pretty easy to draw really. i painted it with dab of yellow CH studio paint, stamped with archival black and adhered to the flower with matte accents ' yes that glues just as good as the gloss lol)

instead of the cute reindeer that i haven't got! i got some harlequin grungeboard letters, rubbed them in places with distress embossing ink and embossed with fine back embossingpowder, inked with fired brick! i love this combo!!!! going to use it again for sure!! bold! i love it! keeping in the same colour i did my tag with fired brick, black soot and aged mahogany, splashed, dried and stamped snowflakes with fired brick.

added the black flower and leaf and a little word on the button, voila!

tag 12

the grungepaper flower!!!!

well i have done so many of tem that i really felt like trying a new thing here! i had the stickback canvas at hand remember! soooo i hand-cut the flowers from the canvas, painted with dab of yellow and dash of red, both CH studio paints, watered down just a little.

colour looks way stronger cos of the flash on my camera, dark day again... sorry

i think this flower has room for improvement, needs to be done a little differently than with grungepaper but i am going to perfect it cos it looks really neat and so different with the canvas look, pretty pleased with myself :)

done!!! all twelve done! what am i going to blog about now????

it was been fun though, more blogging, more response, sharing, visiting blogs! intense but nice.

now i need to get all the tags on one pic to send to Tim

and give myself the chance to win his big prize :)

but first...i'm going to take a little nap before the kids get home!

thanks all for joining me on my twist on the magnificant 12 tags of Christmas by Tim Holtz!

xxxx

still no tag 11 & 12

2009-12-14T18:41:00.004+01:00

i know i promised the last two tags, truth is: i am shattered, i feel every single little muscle in my body, think i am getting ill.

i did work on the tiny art pieces for the 5 goodiebags, no they have not yet left the building but thet will by the end of the week for sure! even tiny tag artwork takes time! here's a sneak peek, not yet finished but you get the idea

my five blue hair angels, backgrounds are bare but as i said, unfinished.

i had already told you all that i had a friend here for the weekend, she wanted to help make some things to remember her father by.

as soon as we were going through the photo's i picked these two out, her father with herself as a baby and with her daughter as a baby, they are almost identical, the way he is looking, holding the baby, it just felt like the right match for this canvas.

her dad didn't like too many frills and things so i kept it simple,

painted the Prima paintable with distress inks.

stamped the letters on grungeboard (tim's stamps) cut out and embossed with distress powder to give them a rough look.

then i did a book, my friend helped with this, keeping in mind she is not a crafter lol! she did well on distressing the edges of the pages and the photo's.

again, i kept it simple, gessoed the cover and painted with cranberry dabber and dry brushed with pearl and gold, on top of eachother they give a more platinum look, i like that.

i glued pages together with CH matte medium because the pages were very thin, i stamped backgrounds with vintage photo and aged maghony, using lots of my Tim's stamps.

we added tags that she will write on at home.

it was an emotinal weekend for both of us, heavy to be honest

but i am glad i could help her and she is happy.

i am a little drained though, suppose it's normal.

on a lighter note (and i am getting tired of sitting up, really feeling ukky!)

here is the finished advents houses i made for Hobbyfarm.

the roofs can be taken of by undoing the ribbon.

i inked and stickled the roofs, they look so adorable in real life.

there you have it!

i'm shattered so end of blog post

i will not promise the tags for tomorrow, no idea how i will be feeling, but you never know, they might be here so come back and look just to make sure you don't miss them

have a good evening, mine will be a short one, off to bed early i think.

xxxx

blog candy over on the artistic stamper

2009-12-13T18:40:00.002+01:00

just a quick post to let you know about the wonderful giveaway over on Jennies blog here's the link: http://theartisticstamper.blogspot.com/
i will make and post my 11th & 12 tag here tomorrow.
now go visit Jennie! she too made the twelve tags so it is nice to see her take on them too.
xxx

no Tag 11 yet

2009-12-11T21:20:00.008+01:00

hello hello, no! no tag today! owwwwww untthinkable nearly! but you know what? i had a bit of me-time in the city with a friend today, hanging out, drinking coffee, bit of shopping, lunch, you know just ahhhhhhhhh relaxing time. no time to make tags or anything else, didn't even cook!!! got pizza instead. so a lovely lazy day alllll day! so proud of myself.

i did finish an angel painting last night, the light was really bad today but i took a picture anyway, doesn't really show the true colours, the ochre in her face is really very very subtle in real life, strange how it is so hard in this pic, ah well here it is anyway.

she is an adorable red head angel, apparently i do a lot of red heads... now where does my inspiration for that come from i wonder... i had a nice time painting her, lovely new golden fluids mixed with my studio paints by Ranger of course and i have some wonderful Sterward Gill paints on their way from Scotland, can't wait to get them in !! they are sooooo beautiful, can't even describe them, you need to see them for yourself!

ah the flowers on the windowsill inside are dead! i know, i should throw them out huh!

but see how my geraniums are still flowering strong outside!!! December i might add! see this is where the ochre in her face is harsh but not in real life i promise you :)

the wings are very textured so i didn't beeswax them,

all the rest of this 60X30cm painting was waxed

bit too dark picture to see the lettering at the bottom! it says EMBRACE in nice bright red really ( i might have to take a better pic tomorrow of the weather decides i can)

she is telling me to embrace love,she is holding my heart, she is reminding me to embrace all the love around me, the love in my heart even if i don't realize it at times, there are so many things to love, it is not always about romance now is it? lol i am in love with my paints for example, i enjoy painting so much, it just feels right and makes me happy and carefree., i love my children of course, goes without saying that! i love my doggy, did you notice him in the background, too lazy to be bothered about me painting pretty angels.

ok tags, cos there is a fat chance you came to see my take on Tim's 11th Xmas tag!

Monday! i will post the last two tags on Monday, i am having a friend over this weekend and we will be working on a personal item for her to remember her father by, so no time for tags.

you understand.

hope you all have a great weekend, see you on Monday! xxx

still time to start following my blog!

Tag 10 quick quick

2009-12-10T12:05:00.004+01:00

first of all, i love Ti'ms colourful tag!!!i only have one fillable pen with cranberry in it so i went for the one colour on my tag which makes it totally diffferent than with the colour blocks. i did go back in the end with some wild plum on a felt but it isn't so easy cos of he thickness of the grungeboard letters so i got a real random look which is actually pretty but does not show on pic at all. i went with an espresso dabber instead of the black, just felt a little too harsh with my one colour. i wanted to add some stickles somewhere... hummm might still rub some on.

i have been playing with Ten Second Studio metals for a while now but i didn't have the metal foil so i had to use cheapy narrow metal and put down strokes of it! and it was way too thin and ripped so i needed to put down a second layer, you see, a tag with issues lol but still fun even with my limitations of materials. we did something like this at Ranger U and i loved it then too! In 2010 it will be turning up on some of the classes so watch out. there is something relaxing about embossing metal... aaaahhh

well, anyway, my tag much prettier in real, pic is not doing it any justice at all but i am not going to take a new pic lol i am in painting mode!!! painting ANGELS!!! maybe that is why the tag is a quick quick version. i want to paint!!!! what can i say? i'm having fun with the big wings and the soft faces and the light coming from all around... ok you get the picture, you know what kind of mood i'm in lol

oh and angel in the ba&ck is nowhere near finished so don't judge her apperiances just yet :)

off to my physical therapist for some pain and suffering no doubt! thne back to painting

hope your day is a supercool one! xxx

Tag 9 poor darling xxx

2009-12-09T14:38:00.005+01:00

oh i like today's tag alot! the poor screaming kid!!

as usual, my version of tim's wonderful tag.

what did i not have at hand?

the filmstrip ribbon - type charms - photo corners.

i did have he mini filmstrip stamp so i stamped it onto light transparent sheet and dried carefully with the heattool, i stamped with Jet Black Archival from Ranger, it dried fine!wfeeew!

okay i knowi didn't stamp straight,

but it does fit in with the vintage look is what i am saying if anyone asks :p

then i cut out all the clear parts, don't think i really had to do that but i did it anyway.

cut the pics to size! fiddley job glueing them in with the glossy accents;

i covered the larger photo with the same transparent sheet because i had printed on plain paper. i made the photo corners by folding plain paper then inked with walnut stain.

i found some round tags and type like sticky letters i must of bought like a century ago!

haha but seeeee! they came in handy,

never throw things out! no matter how old and dated they might seem to you!

i covered them with glossy accents (still al little dull cos it wasn't yet dry when i took the pic)

i didn't want to add the 25 cos i had done that on yesterday's tag so i put on this little snowflake charm that i got on a new cardigan i bought, cool huh!

to add a good dash of Christmas colour i dymo-ed in red. a flashy detail along with the ribbon and the beautiful poinsettia.

i stamped "fears" at the side and added a bit of page from an old french book to the left side simply cos it felt a little empty, probably cos i placed the filmstrip a bit too far to the middle, same reason why i added the vintage lace to thebottom (why am i so honest??? i could simply say it was my design!!! lol)

well anyway i like my tag, i love the bold red details! anyone who knows me also knows i sometimes like to jump out of my own comfortzone! this red on the vintage is me jumping!!

my little boy ended up having laryngitis, not the flu!

so! one little kid home ill, mind you! his throat isn't stopping him from talking non-stop! i mean NON-STOP!!!! helppppp

have a great day

* don't forget that on my birthday i am picking one lucky follower to recieve a gift*

tag 8 four more to go

2009-12-08T16:50:00.005+01:00

voila! tag 8, my version of it that is!

i don't have the holly stamp, nor the bells, so i improvised a bit.

i drew the holly leaves onto grungeboard freehand,

painted them green and dabbered the edges gold.

i dabbered the 25 in gold too and toned down with a bit of black distress ink.

the music stamp i don't have either so i used a diff one on the vellum.

i actually stuck the vellum on with gold paintdabber, i had it at hand and it works perfect as adhesive!! (did you not know that??? haha then you didn't do my Ragerized I workshop :))

i rubbed a bit of mustard seed distress ink where the light shud be, just to give it a glow :)

the berries at the bottom are little blobs of cranberry dimensional pearls, Ranger of course!

well, i like tim's tag and i like mine too.

short post because i'm now off to the doc with my little boy, he has flu i am guessing.

hope you are all still having fun with the tags!

i got Tim's permission to translate for my Belgian/Dutch readers!!!

so if you want a flemish/dutch version of tim's tags let me know and i will get it to you by mail asap

bye for now! have a good one xxx

(don't forget to become a follower, my birthday is coming up soon and i am giving one of my followers a presssie!!!)

Tag 5 and 6 and 7!!!

2009-12-07T19:57:00.004+01:00

look who has been busy;;;

tag 5

i used a 7Gypsies metal border, really easy, it's adhesive and cutable with tim's scissors!

i didn't have the charm fragments so i used the normal oval ones, that proved a bit of a challenge, i had to make up some kind of charm like thing so i wrapped a bit of the wire around first and then covered with foil, not quite the same but it still looks cool.

the white rub-on was replaced by some white embossing and the distress embossing powder by verdigris from the antiquities range from Ranger it works well!

tag 6

again some improvisation going on! i had no black embossing powder at hand while i was working on this yesterday so i stamped with pitch black pigment and embossed with clear, well actually, a little story... during a workshop ome time ago, i had both clear and frosted crystal open and while explaining something i picked up the wrong jar, you guessed it! i poured frosted into clear!! and yes that is what i had in my hands yesterday so my embossing as a cool mixture! and i mean cool! it is pretty neat. the fluffy white stuff that tim used as snow looks so cool but again no where to be found here in belgium so i used Aleene's glitter snow and it is nice, i had never used this before but it does the trick. i love the idea of the tree on the car! so tim! don't you think??

tag 7

the mask sheets were not available to me for this one so i made my own but i do really love tim for making these sheets! i am getting a load once they are here!

i like this tag, the white paint coming through is so vintage, along with the distress stickles and the vintage Santa really gets me into a Christmas mood.

oh because of the colours i had chosen to ink my tag (fired brick, broken china) the Merry Christmas stamp didn't show up too well so i embossed it with clear and now it really pops, it's all about making quick decisions and trusting your crazy ideas as Tim once put on a stamp!

tag 8 tomorrow!

mine will be late in the day as i am away most of the day

so many people are enjoying the tags, it is a wonderful thing that we are all sharing, it is the spirit of Xmas really!

now i am off to draw angels, i can't wait to start painting on one, i bouht the most beautiful paints today at the art store, a small fortune, oh my god they are expensive but lush lush lush!

now let me go play! i'll be back tomorrow!

and am i a good blogger or what?? two post in one day i might add!!!

and winners!!! don't forget to send me your address via mail, onlt that way can i get your goodiebag out the door, this will be Wednesday if i have all the addresses!!!

love and peace! xxx t

the winners are...

2009-12-07T08:50:00.004+01:00

so happy people, the winners of the five goodiebags are...

i put all 17 names in my trust hat

i had no other innocent hand around but my own,

but you all know i am honest and would not peek while grabbing!!

so here goes:

all in the hat

Shana and Brenda

yay for them! Shana came to see me yestersday even though she is in the middle of her exams so mum let her on to the computer for five minutes just so she could comment on my blog to have a chance at winning and she even phoned me cos she couldn't find how to do it lol! all that trouble has payed off!!! see i told you to take a chance!!!

the Kathrynwheel!

a northern lass like me!!! ohhh glad you won to cos you had just missed out on the 100th blog draw just because you thought shopping was more fun lol!

happy for you too!!

the Scrapbookdoll
way to go M.A. ( my nickname for Marie Ann)
happy you won!! you struggled so much with the Grungepaper flower and still had the spirit to fix it when you got home! your goodiebag is on it's way haha!

Hilda!!

Hilda is one of my trusty scrap class chicks!!! she had NOOOOOO idea how to comment on my blog, she complains to me about it every time she sees me lol! i told her to get help! and she did! and her very first comment... she wins a prize! gosh some people have all the luck!!!

happy for you Hildake!

and last but nott least!!

Jennie!!

i only got to know Jennie after starting up the Ranger U grad group on facebook, Jennie joined and we became FB friends and started reading eachothers blogs due to the tags i think lol!

so Jennie! from one Ranger Educator to an other: Happy you won too!

and oowwwww to the people who didn't win anything, better luck next time!

thank you for all the wonderful comments

i am so grateful for you all taking the time!

the &é tags are not finished, i am behind on the weekend ones because i was busy but today they will be posted along with today's tag

i got so much feedback on my version of the tags, it is amazing really! thank you!

i have promised some of my Belgians that is will make a translation of Tim's tags for them just so they can fully understand what the guy is saying lol! it is in nooooo way to be used other than personal use and never ever to be published or passed on, please please take this into account

now in flemish so they really do get it lol:

ik zal de tim's tags vertalen in het vlaams, nederlands voor wie ze wil maar aub!!! ik druk er heel sterk op dat het echt enkel voor persoonlijk gebruik is en nooit ergens gepubliceerd kan of mag worden en ook niet doorgegeven worden aan anderen, okido, mercikes!

wie ze wil moet me maar een mailtje sturen

I am actually going to ask Tim for permission

first just so I am sure it is okay for him.

okay, so now i have done this draw, i will make the goodiebags today, make some tiny artworks to go with them

you need to mail me your addresses privatly to

wattstanya@skynet.be

also SANDRA!!! i need your address because you won the 100th blog post prize!

i am now off o the art store to go but paint!! i need some more colours to paint my angels in suzi's class, ahhhhh relaxation for me!

then i need to order some Steward Gill's paints, all the way up in Scotland! brillll paint, can't wait to get them!

so my relaxing day will be a busy one i think!

hope you all have a wonderful happy day!

love!!

oh and one more thing!!!

it's my birthday soon... no i'm not saying that to get cards or pressies! duh!!!! lol

i am going send a pressie to one of my followers! i will choose a winner, randomly of course!)

on my birthday!!!

so if you are not yet a follower, well you might want to become one before the 21st

bye my shiny happy people. xx

Tag 4 and the winner is...

2009-12-04T12:19:00.003+01:00

ok here goes, i have only 5 minutes to blog! i need to be out the door, off to the kid's Sinterklaas party at school ( sinterklaas is like Santa Claus, dont ask, i think he is weird and i don't like hime at all and i think he messes up Xmas and all that but hey, i live in Belgium so i have to adjust, or at least act like it! so i'm off to the party in four minutes!

winner of my 100th post gift is Sandra!!! congrats Sandra!!! mail me your address and i will get it to you sooooon!

tag 4 on Tim's blog was a bit of a challenge! i don't have the cut and dry felt ( didn't really like the stuff to be honest, but again, i am cinverted, i will go buy it now!!) i don't have the bubbles, not available in Belgium yet it think but i will look for them tomorrow oh and no shattered vintage glass... so i was thinking, hummm... miss this tag today but i wouldn't be me if i hadn't found a way around it all so here is my tag

i used a 1x3inch frame and the plastic bubbles is in fact cut from this:

pretty cool alternative i think! i stamped the tag and inked it spice marmalade, weathered wood and a bit of fired brick, edges with black distress then some gold paintdapper and i stamped the speckles on with he gold too. i rubbed some crystal stickles on the roof and frame, put a brad and washer on just under the roof cause i had a little bit of space from putting the roof on over the chain, lol i did do a lot my way today i guess. little girl image is from Lisa's art, i will put the link in later! i really am short for time now!!!

don't forget to leave a comment, i have loads of readers ( i can see on my counter) but not many leave a comment, please do and have a go at winning one of the five goodiebags!!! the draw is on Monday morning (CET).

ok i did NOT check for typos lol!!! i'm dashing out the door as this loads.... bye xxx

TAG 3 & 100th post on my blog!!

2009-12-03T11:26:00.003+01:00

My third tag following Tim's 12 tags of christmas! it is a wonderful challenge to do different techniques everyday, a refreshing of knowledge plus some cool new ideas! i like this alcohol ink technique he used, Tim's tag, indeed soooo easy yet i had never tried it simply because it did not appeal to me :) but i went with him (i am such a good girl) and must agree that it is pretty cool as a background! one more for my technique tagbook (those who know me also know i take my tagbook everywhere! my little Ranger bible)

i actually only own earthtones!! i must stock up on some lights and brights. i also never saw the need of getting the pitch black! but hey... i am converted, i learned a lot today! so big thank you to Tim! see,even us Ranger Educators learn every day!!

oh yes, the acrylic saying at the top is one my friend Sue gave me. i covered it with snow cap paintdabber and wiped back off, the letters are engraved so took the paint really well, again, simple but effective, i did this on the token too, you might have noticed. i attached the saying with Tim's attacher, i did have to give the staples a little bang with the hammer on the back but it worked like a charm!

and i didn't like the black look on the tag along with my colours so i wiped over it with fired brick and stamped the speckles on.

tomorrow day 4 of the tags! come back and see what my look on it is!

and! tatatadaaaaaa! this is my 100th post on this blog!!! i don't write that often, ok , now i am writing every day due to Tim's tag challenge, i started this blog right after i had attended Ranger U in October last year and i have enjoyed it so far a&nd have come in contact with some lovely people all around the world! oh i want to move to Arizona, Spain, UK, ..... lol.

to celebrate my 100th post, the first person to comment today will recieve a little piece of my art ( if you are not a fan of my paintings then wait a bit to comment lol!)

yes, you guessed it, it will be a little doll/girl painting, especially made for you! meaning, you will have to wait a little for it to be finished :)

ohhh i wonder who is going to comment first! where will my art be travelling to????

ok! i'm off to do way more crafty arty stuff! love!!! xxxx t

2nd Tag of Christmas

2009-12-02T10:58:00.003+01:00

Here i am again! my second tag is done! addict??? yeah yeah maybe! lol but i have a pretty long to-do-list for today so i wanted to do this first of all cause i knew i would not have time otherwise! priorities! lol

mine of course is different to Tim's, i changed the colours, i used vintage photo on the tag instead of the suggested pine needles, my ornate stamp was the mini version, i don't own the larger one so i addes on a ticket to fill up the space. the perfect pearl splats are everywhere! i did read Tim's advice on covering anything you don't want the splats on but ummmmm.... well haha

i was over the moooooon that i had enough of the metal flowers in my treasure box! this metal rose turned out to be a fiddly event but i am not one for giving up and i made my rose and i LOVE it! OMG!!! this is so cool! I think TIM is totally generous showing us this one! you have to agree!!!

for those who are seeing me tonight or the coming weekend, i will bring my tags with me!!

I love this tag, i think it turned out just as i wanted it to! this chick is totally recharged;

and! i enroled in another Suzi Blu's class! ANGELS! i can't wait for it to start! She is such a push in my back when it comes to me expanding my drawing and painting talents! yes! i do have talent! lol! i finally admit to that.

ok! off to do some more crafty, arty stuff! and don't forget to comment to get the chance to win a goodiebag! 13 entries so far! ( lol i am not tim holtz! he got 3000 comments yesterday!!!)

1st of 12 tags of Christmas

2009-12-01T17:16:00.002+01:00

I'm going to try and do all 12 tags of Christmas over on Tim's blog!

This is my first one, of course i didn't have the wonderful rock candy stickles or paint so i reallllllly had to improvise on this one! i inked as he suggested, stampedpretty much as he did but then, the rock cand paint!! i covered the whole tag with Crackle accents instead, totally not the same effect but pretty neat actualy, i got some cool cracks evne though i got impatient and tried to speed up with the heattool, don't do that!!!

as you will see my snowman is totally diff but i think it does the trick,

he seems a little pink in this pic but that is my lighting cause he is in no way pink lol.

well, i can't wait to see tomorrows tag, they appear at 9am Belgian time, jsut so you know!

i bought my Xmas tree today so i will be decorating it tonight, fun!!!

and don't forget this:

with alll this generosity going around in blog land could not stay behind!
with Sinterklaas (Belgian kind of santa claus, don't ask more info, i don't know lol), my birthday and Xmas coming up in December i thought it might be time to make a few goodiebags!
goodiebag: all bits and bobs, craft stuff, a little art piece, little!!, just some fun things really!
how can you get your hands on one of these goodiebags?
by commenting on this post!! (the previous post actually)
as easy as that, ok you could start following my blog aswell, wouldn't give you more chance but it would be nice to have more followers, only if you want to of course! haha!
so just leave a comment on this post!
i have five goodiebags, or at least i will when i start making them!
i will randomly pick 5 names next monday
who knows, if there are many names to choose from i might do it all over again next week,
i'll see how it goes

have a good one!
xox tanya ( i actually can spell my name haha)

giveaway and quick chat

2009-11-28T11:42:00.003+01:00

1st picture: an advents calender in the making, 25 tiny houses on a square canvas, every roof will be able to be removed to fine a little note or goodie inside! still working away on this one,

i'll post again once finished and i will add more info on the materials and so on

2nd picture: yeah my new BlackBerry!!!and i love it! ( is it an "it"? is it not a "she", she is smart, it has to be a she! don't you think?)

anyway, i love BB and can you see what the fist web was this chick visited on her BB?? yes! Ranger! adddddict huh!

3rd picture: a brooch i made using some things Tim, ornate plate, token, glossy accents, metal flowers, grungepaper flowers i made, tiny tiny! hard work so tiny lol and one of Tim's beautiful keys.
i myself love this piece and i have had it on all week :)

4th picture: this little painting i made for an art exchange so this will be posted on it's way to the US on Monday, i should have sent it off way sooner but it took me longer to finish with so much going on.

5th statement has no picture :)

GIVEAWAY

been on Tim's blog???

he is doing his wonderful 12 tags of Christmas again so i am more than happy!

His main man Mario stole his blog today and posted his own giveaway! so go check Tim's/Mario's blog!!

Mario is more than a sweet guy and i know that for a fact, personal experiance!

kisses for Mr Mario xox

with alll this generosity going around in blog land could not stay behind!

with Sinterklaas (Belgian kind of santa claus, don't ask more info, i don't know lol), my birthday and Xmas coming up in December i thought it might be time to make a few goodiebags!

goodiebag: all bits and bobs, craft stuff, a little art piece, little!!, just some fun things really!

how can you get your hands on one of these goodiebags?

by commenting on this post!!

as easy as that, ok you could start following my blog aswell, wouldn't give you more chance but it would be nice to have more followers, only if you want to of course! haha!

so just leave a comment on this post!

i have five goodiebags, or at least i will when i start making them!

i will randomly pick 5 names next monday, no not tomorrow, the next!

who knows, if there are many names to choose from i might do it all over again next week,

i'll see how it goes

right! now i'm off to do the other million things on my to do list of today!

love and hugs! have a great weekend

xxx tany

not checked for typos, you know me!

Tim's 12 tags of Christmas

2009-11-23T11:56:00.002+01:00

if you haven't been to Tim's blog yet, here is his post!!! join in on the fun and spirit of the 12 tags of Christmas! i'm joining in and i would love all of you to do so too, Tim will love it!!!!
love xxx

that's right, i am moving on and giving back and doing the "12 Tags of Christmas" for 2009 - crazy i know, but i love sharing with all of you to let you know how much i appreciate you. the "12 Tags of Christmas" will start on December 1st and go through December 12th. if you're new to the "12 Tags of Christmas", well it's a festivity of creative goodness, a time to deck the halls, and let your artistic whimsy get you in the holiday spirit. each day i will post a holiday tag with complete step by step instructions for you to follow along. the tags stay up all month and then are archived on the bottom left column of the blog - the past 2 years of the "12 Tags" for 2007 & 2008 are already there so check them out! now let's not forget about all of the prizes, one of my favorite things about the "12 Tags" is the "12 Days of Giveaways" that go along with them! each day i will pick random winners from the daily comments you post on the blog! this year i am kicking it up a notch though so be ready: if you're a daily winner and your name is posted on the blog, you must claim your prize by the end of the day you're name is selected because if you don't, the prizes will roll over to the next days winners! also, in true "12 Tags" style, the more comments on the blog each day, the more prizes i'll be giving away. so be sure to take EACH DAY and post a comment on the blog and join the festive fun! hey you just might win more than once - it's happened before...
now i know that many of you create a tag each day along with me and let me tell you - i love that! in fact at the end of this year's 12 days i'll be holding a contest for those that have completed all "12 Tags of Christmas" for 2009, and i have some AMAZING prizes to give away for that! so of course as you can imagine i have TONS of things to do to still finish up the book and get everything ready if i'm going to pull this thing off. i'll be launching the first tag at 12:01am on December 1st so i am leaving this post up until then - fair enough? so you'll have time to gather your favorite holiday stamps, inks, and anything else you want to play with. tell your friends, post it on your blogs, facebook, and twitter because the more people who get involved in the holiday cheer and post comments during the "12 Tags of Christmas" the more gifts and goodies i'll be sharing with all of you! okay, so i hope you're as excited as i am about the 2009 "12 Tags of Christmas" then please post a comment - i would love for you to share your excitement with me, not to mention, it will give you practice for the coming weeks. see all of you on December 1st, 2009 let the holidays begin - i can't wait...t!m

talking in pictures

2009-11-20T08:39:00.006+01:00

blinged my laptop! silver Paintdabber, uhu Ranger of course! used the hammered metal effect which is so easy, you just take the dabber and gently "hammer" it onto the surface, you get this really neat pattern that resembles hammered metal, once dry i rubbed platinum Stickles over it using my trusty finger! i think it is really neat! some think i am a little crazy! ahhhh who cares!

this heart-shaped bread bun kind of reminded me love can be found in places least expected

made a canvas as a birth gift for my son's boss at work

i love making these Wendy Vecci type grungepaper flowers, i make my own version of them but the idea is Wendy's, they are so cool!

Emiel welcome to this crazy wonderful world

been beeswaxing, i love it! very relaxing... i need relaxing

Barcelona! i am soooooooo impressed by Gaudi! it will be noticable in my art soon i'm sure

LOVE, made as a birthday pressie for my wonderful friend J!

passed all his pilot exams! now looking for a job... anyone got a plane to be flown??

i love these letters, about 5 inch big if my eyeballing is correct, these i gessoed, painted with Claudine's paints, added Grungeboard and Tim's embellishments.

this pic was taken on my bookshelf, not the best shot...

they looked really good in there new home! xxx

Bart and me in Spain, he has just turned 20 my son! he's a stunner i think, but of course i am his mum... but he is, isn't he? :)

Lisa Mitchell and me and a really great but scarey street artist on the Rambla in barcelona!

there were a lot more wonderful street artists! really cool to see.

it was a good day!

Sue and me in one of our more normal pics...haha

we had such a good week!!

Sue is coming to Belgium in Februari! bring a good coat sue, the temps are nowhere near as good as in your part of the world!!!

thanks again for having us!xxx

oh and this!!

sneak peek for you Evelien!

and OLIVIA! Evelien's newborn little girl!

Welcome to this beautiful crazy world too!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

not in the mood for many words, the painmeds are giving me loads of side effects but the painrelief seems to have worn off! so i'm kind of pretty much back to being always in pain!

to give you an idea of the pain: i burned my inner fore arm with my hot glue gun! it's hot! , skin went straight off, third degree burn! no pain, none what so ever, the morfine is good! yet my foot i still feel like hell. imagine? trying not to whine on though.

i have come to the conclusion once again that i am not superwoman and even if it means dissapointing people, i have decided to take more time off for myself.

hope to blog soon but i'm not promising to :)

have a good weekend xxx

Breathing again

2009-10-25T20:30:00.004+01:00

a few days ago Patty aka Eclectic Archivist sent me a mail saying that when i come up for air there was an award waiting for me on her blog... this made me smile... kind of gave me a reason to blog again... good one Patty! :)

The award comes with rules...of course:

1 Thank the person who gave you the award... Thank you Patty!

2 Copy the logo and place it in your blog. (see the logo above :)

3 Link the person who nominated you. ( linked in first sentence of this post)

4 Name 7 things about yourself that no one would really know.

5 Nominate 7 "Kreative Bloggers".

6 Post links to the 7 blogs you nominate7 Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know your nominated them.

so.... 7 things about myself no one would really know huh?

1 i can't whistle, i just cannot produce any sound when i try! it is so funny!

2 my students called me the Grammar dragon behind my back ( i taught English for many years)

4 i would love to speak perfect French and Spanish

5 as a young girl is was a really good gymnastic

6 i am a huge METALLICA fan wohoo nothing else matters...

7 i adore strawberries and raspberries....mmmmmm delish!

okay seven things about me you may or may not know or even want to know lol but there they are.

now to name others to do some sharing!

Kate http://thekathrynwheel.blogspot.com/

Sue http://desiretoinspire-suec.blogspot.com/

Michelle http://michellereneebernard.blogspot.com/

Aimee http://aimeeinohio.blogspot.com/

Lynda http://butterflydream27.blogspot.com/

okay that is only 5! i like to cheat sometimes lol

----------------------------------------------------------------

so what have i been up to??? well first of all, the whole ordeal with my mother's death, especially the family issues that came with it, it all took so much of me that i could no longer put up with the pain in my leg and foot so i finally went to doc to get pain relief! not an easy deal with Suddeck so for the last four weeks i have been following a plan of morfine patches and neurontin, dose gets higher every two days. pain is less, not gone, in no way gone but the edge is off it so i seem to be a little more mobile, ont he other hand the meds are doing my head in! they really take getting used to! i can cycle a little on the home trainer! i'm proud of that!

i have been drawing and painting, i haven't got everything on photo but this one is my latest, i put her on my facebook and have recieved some really lovely comments. thank you!

to think that a year ago i took my first class with Suzi Blu! i had enroled in her Petit Doll class just before i went to Ranger U, i had never drawn a face before in my entire life, as a mixed media artist i had no need to, for scrapbooking neither, so it was purely to challenge myself and to get my mind off the pain in my foot ( i had just had the surgery then) i never, in a million years, thought i even had it in me! and today i can say i am really happy with my faces.

and as a Ranger addict of course i use all things Ranger in my paintings: paint is mostly CH studio paints mixed with Golden glaze, i also use Adirondack Dimensional pearls mixed with CH, water, perfect pearls. stamps are Tim's! inks are all Ranger, Grungeboard is uhhhhh.... Tim's! isn't it great how you can use all the wonderful Ranger goodies in Mixed Media paintings?? i love it!

catch you all again soon!

(not checked for typos! you know me!)

xxxx love!

art is healing

2009-09-24T19:43:00.006+02:00

My mother passed away yesterday.

a short and hard statement and the reality of life and death.

her suffering has come to an end and for that i am relieved for her

my dreams of ever having a mum have passed away along with her.

where does that leave me? i really do not know at this point in time.

and the totally sad thing is that the family is so divided by all this, my eldest brother is not coping with the way i am coping with it, my second brother showed up after 17 years of not knowing where he was an expected way too much of me, my youngest brother seems to be the wisest of the three of them and can at least talk calmly and with thought. i guess grief does weird things to people so i am trying my best not to take offence and to understand that they are simply not being themselves.

it is making the whole ordeal very stressful and more painful than it already is.

you know what? you get to know who your true friends are in times like these and that is heart warming and helps more than i will ever be able to put into words.

but i breathe, i look at my kids and i breathe, my Estée came into the kitchen this evening, i was peeling potatoes for dinner, she stood there blinking her eyes at me and i asked what she was doing, i am showing you my love she said! ohhhh do i even have to tell you that i had to fight back tears??? i am so glad to be a mum! makes me even sadder that my mother never took that opportunity, such a waste. but okay, it is past, tanya it is past!

yesterday my two youngest kids ran the cross country school run,

i am not saying they won prizes but i was proud of their effort and everyone got a medal and my little girl was over the moon with hers! and of course she was not going to run in a plain white t-shirt! tssss what was i thinking! pink necklace and purple top made it a stylish event.

i realize just how blessed i am in this life even though i did not have the conventional youth growing up with a mum and dad, happy family and all that... i still am a whole person and i am happy with who i am and i do not care if there are some people (family) who would like to see me be different and more like them.

i am me and i am proud of that, i have kind of realized that in this whole ordeal.

i am a true believer of every cloud having a silver lining and here my youngest brother has turned out to be the silver lining! so little bro, if you read this, know that i appreciate all your kind words and the respect you have shown me and know that the feeling is mutual!

art... i have been drawing, here is just one of my girls, the background is not finished but there is no rush; her face is far from symmetrical but you know what? i like her, she has wisdom to her

wishing you all a lovely weekend, enjoy your family and loved ones

love is life!!! xxxx

i know it's been a while

2009-09-15T23:04:00.003+02:00

oh i have been a bad blogger but life has been keeping me busy.

Summer came and went in a flash, the kids have been back to school two weeks already, we are still getting used to the early mornings and catching the schoolbus on time.

Estée is now in school and no longer in kindergarden, so that means homework! and she takes it seriously, so cute, learning to read and write and she is already so good at it.

smart girl my little six year old, the youngest, in school, time kind of flies.

and not only when you are having fun i have found out.

my mother has Alzheimers, she is 59 and has been ill for a long time now, i haven't followed it from close, we hadn't really spoken in years and before that we never had a real connection, i grew up in England with my dad and only got to know my mother as a teenager, it was too late to connect.

she is in the final stage and it is so sad to witness this degrading illness taking away who she was. Her partner in life is a real saint, he has been taking care for her through out the whole thing, i hope she realized how lucky she was with him.
it sounds hard but i never actually had a mum but now i know i never will have one, no more chances.

all i can do is forgive her and wish her a safe journey. and i have done just that. what else is there? i hope she has peace with herself, that her soul has learned in this life.

i used to think i was superwoman but now i admit to being a little tired. the whole ordeal with my daughter, the Sudeck in my foot, my divorce and now my mother, it seems to be too much to handle in one little year.

but i am who i am and i get through things, i always do... so i will this time too!

i am lucky to be able to ventilate in my art, i still draw every evening and i still paint and i write and it all helps me to stay sane. i am lucky to have friends to talk to when i need to.

so as you see life has been throwing lemons at me, just a matter of figuring out how to make the lemonade.

you all bear with me i will have some art to show for all this once i get through it.

thanks for stopping by, have a great day and take care

love, t

A Thousand Splendid Suns

2009-08-14T12:05:00.004+02:00

A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini was the inspiration for this painting

painting Goddesses

2009-08-10T23:38:00.005+02:00

some pics of what i have been up to in Suzi's goddess & poet class

of course most of the products used are Ranger but i am loving the golden fluid Acrylics too!

see i can post twice in one week! lol

long time no see

2009-08-08T12:01:00.002+02:00

oh dear i have been a bad blogger!!!
and i have been recieving emails about this... sorry that i was worrying some of you!

i am fine! nothing major going on really, still at the therapist with the stupid foot that has bene giving me a bit more grief due to the warm weather and me maybe walking around on it a little too much! i admit! so i am on crutch most of the time.

what have i ben up to? well still drawing faces in the portrait class, i am way behind on all the wonderful mixed media Suzi is showing us but at least i am drawing pretty noses and full lips lil

a few friends came o play last week, we made exploding boxes, nohing too difficult to ensure us enough talking and laughing time, we had a good day and will repeat it again in two weeks time

while the kids were at their dad i had e few eveings of fun and mojitos at the street festival in Gent, no more mojitos for me! let me tell you!
i had a few evenings out with friends, a shopping trip to antwerp with my friend MP.
i've been reading lots, going to the film,taking the kids to playgrounds and theme parks, lots of swimming for my foot,going out for dinner, not much home cooking been going on around here, been to the hairdresser, went on a date (no details however lol except that i am so not ready to go on dates lol)... all fun things but not really much to blog about you must agree :)

mind you i have been productive too! i finished a magazine article on Ranger's Utee, i am also preping for September and October, not all lazy bones!!

so as you see my lovely followers, i have been up to loads of non-blogable things lol

hope you are all fine! i really must admit at the same time that i have not looked at any blogs this last month so if i have not responded to things do not take it personally! i have not been at my computer much, that is the only reason, i know i have probably missed much but that is how it is.

have a great weekend and i hope to hear you all soon, well att least at the end of the Summer haha!

thanks to all you wonderful chicks mailing me! soooo sweeeeeet! xxxxx big hugs and kisses ladies

love! tanya ( not checked for typos lol!)

checking in

2009-07-07T15:22:00.005+02:00

oh dear i haven't really taken time to blog! and i recieved a lovely award from Sanda but still need to put it on here and choose some wonderful blogs to pass it on to, but not today, i am so tired :)

The kids are home for the holidays so i'm spending lots of time with them, making art at night most of the time but missing out on a bit of sleep lol

i painted this Queen yesterday and sat up till late embossing her dress and crown from Ten seconds Studio metal, i love that stuff, i used Claudine Hellmuth paints and Tim's stamps for the background and then added Grungeboard wings.

voila! my shortest post ever! and now i might take a little cat nap ... lol

have a great week!!!! do some fun things!!! ( you now know i probably won't be blogging till next week haha!)

xox

sooo hot!

2009-07-02T15:43:00.003+02:00

oh just checking in! it is way tooooooo hot to make any art!!!

i did draw this pic while the kids were playing at the indoor playground (too hot to be outside!)

i actaully signed up for a portrait class with suzi Blu, starting soon, looking forward to that, i can't wait to learn some 'real' faces and make my own, that is the best thing about Suzi's classes, you learn so much from her but end up making your own faces and not copies of hers! i like that!

oh, i had a mojito last night, celebrating a certain pilot passing his exam!!!!

so damn proud of you J!

right! off to put some water in the kiddie's paddeling pool and jump in after them, this weather is killing me, lol

all having a nice Summer?

love, tanya xox

playing with canvas

2009-06-20T17:28:00.004+02:00

i told you that i was working on a sticky back canvas art project and that i would post if i decided i liked it, well i do... so here you have it!
i altered this Ikea mirror frame with Ranger's sticky back canvas by Claudine Hellmuth.

i did transfers with the studio line paints and gloss medium, stamped with Ranger's archival jet black ink, i did a resist with gesso, of course studioline! and i added a few bits and bobs, some from Tim's collection ,some from my little finds jar. i sealed the canvas with gloss medium before adding the embellishments, this will make it easier to wipe down once i hang it!

not all my transfers are brilliantly done but that is because i was a little impatient lol! i still think they are so cool though! :)

i like the way it has turned out and i am extremely happy with the colours i chose, the yellows, oranges and reds are my colours at the moment, have been for a while actually! they make me happy or maybe i use them because i'm happy?!

have a wonderful weekend!

xox tanya

my pretty girl

2009-06-19T08:27:00.007+02:00

just checking in, letting you all know i'm not lettng myself go with this whole dystrophy thingy!!! actually, now that i know what it is i feel a little better in a strange way, even though the doc says it is the worst outcome of the options he had in mind, still, knowing is way better than feeling like a complete whimp with unknown pains and aches and stuff, you know?

i'm taking meds for the osteoporosis part, i'm doing new painless exercices to strengthen my muscles, i get cool massages to drain fluid from my foot and leg, we are tackling this thing!!! lol

so anyway, one of my chicks from class came to play on Tuesday, she had a little book to finish, we had lots of laughs and a nice chat. i need to have chicks around more often!!!

here is her finished book, she loves it and so she should, she made a really beautiful trip down memory lane. totally handmade, bound with bind-it-all, her first little book! cool huh!

Yesterday i finally got to finish this little girl, i started her a while back, i can tell cos my mouths are changing now so i'm not totally happy with this one anymore but never the less, i finished her, and i like her! 12x24 inches, my favourite size to paint on.

i added a little metal embossed heart, ten second studios metal, i love it! getting myself really into this metal embossing and thought it would be cool to use in my mixed media paintings!

the cool thing about mixed media is that there are no rules or limitations! just fun and experimenting and mixing and letting things go wrong sometimes and still loving it! my kind of art!

my pretty girl is ready to take on the world and even though it hurts sometimes it still feels good!

bit of a message to myself in this one so i am keeping her close.

( the words are cut out of a pretty sassy mag that i 'borrowed' from my son's desk haha! shhhh don't tell him!)

at the moment i'm working on a little project with sticky back canvas, i'll show when finished, if i decide i like it haha!

it's just fun to be playing a bit more again, letting go, all part of the letting go.

so, off to my paints, coffee and ipod docked into the speaker system to let my favourite music fill the room, make me move a bit ( there are still parts of me that move smoothly lol)

a bit of Green Day, Foo Fighters and Red Hor Chili Peppers will do the trick!!!

love you all, thanks for the caring comments on my blog! xox

hope you will all have a day as wonderful as the one i'm having!

xox tanya

not too happy

2009-06-15T18:18:00.002+02:00

well, i got the results from the bone scan and i already knew there was something to be seen and now i know what and i am not at all happy today (to say the least)

apparently the patch to be seen was osteoperosis due to Algoneurodystrophy or othewise known as syndrome of Sudeck (post-traumatic Dystrophy or reflex sympathic dystrophy ) so many names for the same condition. in easy words it means that my sympathic nerve system decided to go crazy after the operation last year in September. why on earth it has taken them this long to even see this goes beyond me and i really am pretty mad about this. and seeing i am apparently in stage 2 of this condition it might not even ever heal, but let's not think of that just yet, one thing at a time.

well,... now i stand where i stand i will just have to deal with it, and don't think i'm being tough, i cried today, i did, i had too, had to get it out.
but now, a few hours later, better informed i know that i am looking at many more months of rehabilition, pain, meds for the osteoporosis, exercises, ...

all the stress i have been thtough the last few months has not helped with this condition, seeing it involves my sympathic nerve system all stress should be avoided! yeah right!

well anyway, i know that there are a few of you who wanted to know so now you kinda know as much as me :)

see still al ittle smile

it'll take a lot more to get me down!
xox tanya

not much to tell, just checking in

2009-06-12T12:56:00.004+02:00

hiya, it 's been a few days so i'm checking in, not that i have much to tell!

i went for a bone scan on Monday, still waiting for the results, however i do know something was to be seen, what and how bad is still the million dollar question i'm afraid, so needless to say i am a bit stressed even though i am really trying to stay cool and occupied, sleeping seems to be a little bit of a problem.

i've been painting a little, drawing alot, writing alot, reading more, playing poker online (waste of time and not for real money!!! shame or i would be rich by now...but keeps me occupied!)

i would so love to get up and dancing! anyway dancing or not i am going to a nice 70's- 80's retro party in a few weeks time and going out with some of my girlfriends, so looking forward to a night of mojitos and laughter and funny clothes.

hope you all have the most wonderful weekend! lots of Sun and Love or chocolate :)

xox tanya

my followers

2009-05-31T10:12:00.003+02:00

hi, i promised i would draw a name from my followers as thanks for following my blog.

i put the names in the hat even anonymous nr one and two and my little boy pulled out...

CHARLOT!!!

so Charlot when you read this please mail me your details so i can send you a litle something for you as thanks for following my blog!

---------------------------------------------

what am i up to? nothing much, lazy out in the garden enjoying the nice weather, resting my ankle cos it really is playing up again. so feet up, drawing pad and pencils at hand, ipod on...

playing with some new faces, just relaxing

hope you all have a wonderful day

xox t

lemonade stand

2009-05-26T09:24:00.005+02:00

hi!!! a couple of days ago i recieved this great award from Sheri but also from Evelien, i really like this one girls! so sweet thank you both xox!!!

The rules of the award (To pick up the Lemonade Stand Award):- Comment on this blog.- Save the award logo to your own computer and use it in your own blog.- Nominate 5 to 10 blogs you feel show great attitude and gratitude.- Link to your nominees within your blog post.- Comment on their blogs to let them know they've received the award.- Link back to the person who gave you the award to show your appreciation.

i will gladly send this on to Sue, Barb, Kate & Michelle. i know that is only four, but they are the ones i want to pass it on to :-)

told you i got my hair cut last week! here is my new short hair! so easy!!!!

that's it for this post, got loads of things to do today! hope you all have good one!!! i plan on having a brilliant day! not a crappy brilliant day! hihi! just a brilliant brilliant day! xox

needed some time

2009-05-25T15:35:00.005+02:00

hi, well... i needed some time to recuperate from my most crappy perfect day evvaaaaa! it did not go well with my dad! i do not feel like explaining it all but believe me it took me many hours to stop crying and feeling angry, lost, upset and sad. still sad about it all but i realize my father does not feel like having some peace and love in his life, even now. nothing i can do about it. i now can only inform how he is through the nurses even though he forbids them to give me any info now!!! thet said he has been acting agressive to everyone and that i should not take it personally! very difficult. but one of life's lessons is to not take anything personal. His state of mind has nothing to do with me, he is only taking it out on me.
and the thing is i knwe it was all going to happen, i did say it would be a day for some home truths! and it was! i did tell him my mind.

anyway, i am calmer now, once again i just need to breathe and move on with my own life.

i helped my brother paint his livingroom, made new curtains for him, made some sipmle art to place on the big bare wall, we bbq'd, we went to see Star Trek which was brilliant! we loved it!!! my son did not understand how we were so excited about it hihi! too young! we were making vulcan signs all night long ( drinks might have had something to do with that!) i nearly got picked up while shopping for a guitar piece for my friend J, such a cute man at the counter! damn!!! my age, goodlooking hihi! he heard me talking to my brother in out english dialect and thought i was dead cute haha! he was so funny tring to imitate me, i had to say "tarrah" to him cos he thought it was so sweet hihi! damn, i should of told him it was my brother with me!!!!! dammmmmmmn! tanya!!!!! a well who knows... i might need to go back some day (two hours drive though!, used to be right around my corner !!!!) sigh................... dream on ! it was funny though and my brother said i should have asked his number hihi! he is trying to get me off the street before i expire!!! what a cheek! a well as you see there was some fun to my weekend, not all pain and loss.

right! off to the shops, fridge is pretty empty!!!

have a great day!!!! xox t

it's such a perfect day

2009-05-22T08:58:00.002+02:00

it's such a perfect day! why? because i think everyday is a perfect day, no matter what might try to be going on in my head, my life, my past trying to creep up on me to make me feel unhappy and unloved all over again. no! it's a perfect day because i say so!

where is this coming from?

well, firstly my dad's operation has been postponed due to other minor health issues so he is still not in the clear there and still he is being such a pain towards my brother, God only knows why he is doing this, i can't get my head around it really, you would think he would choose to have peace and love in his life at times like these ... but no! he chooses to play these games right up to the end. it is hurting my brother. i don't like this. have loads more to say on this but i will not, not now, not today. i will go see him in a few hours and i am taking my brother with me and if he plays games i will stay cool but tell him what i think! it is a perfect day to do so! i have decided.

then, my mother, i call her my mother cos that is what she is technically, not who she has ever been, i learned to live with that, i'm 41 now, i'm over it all. i went to visit her yesterday. she is gone, she is not here anymore! 59 years old and she sits there, no expression on her face what so ever, blank, empty even, so sad, i feel so sad for her no matter what she has done in the past. i thought i still resented her but it has gone, she has gone. it might sound strange but i have found peace with her now she is gone. the woman sitting in the hospital chair rubbing her chin constantly is a stranger to me, i am even more a stranger to her. she realized it was me after a while, it didn't move her though, fine. after ten minutes and me telling her a couple of times that my son bart was there it finally reached her and then she cried. i cried. it is so sad to see her like that. i have loads of thoughts on this matter but i am goingto let them go, it doesn't mattert anymore. peace.

it is a perfect day today! i'm going to let go of all the emotions thet might be bubbling up inside me and am going off to enjoy my day! going into the city, help my son buy clothes, he still wants my help, hihi! love it! then do some shopping for my friend J he needs a little piece for his guitar so i'm off to find that for him and then post it off to the Uk. going to visit dad, he better be good! cos it is a perfect day for some home truths if he isn't.

so, i wish you all a perfect day today, every day!

xox t

another clearbook

2009-05-15T20:32:00.004+02:00

due to mail problems this beautiful clearbook by dorien did not reach me! what a shame because it is a really beautiful piece of art!

so i am showing it to you now and i will sent dorien a little something because it was really unlucky i didn't get this!

you will agree with me that dorien did a good job here! i have talented students in my classes.

I got some questions on how i did the metal embossing so i would like to invite you to go vistit these two crazy chicks at Ten Seconds Studio!!! this link is straight ot their videos on how to embos metal, some cool projects, alot of wacky remarks and funny situations!

well, the weekend has started, hoping for some nice weather so the kids can pay outside

and we can eat out in the garden!

have a wonderful weekend

hope you find time to play and to have fun

or to rest

or meet friends

whatever rocks your boats!

xox tanya

passing on this blog award

2009-05-13T11:40:00.005+02:00

“The Renee award was created by Bella and Ces in honour of their friend Renee. In Bella's own words "this is a brand new award and I have the pleasure and honor of spreading the seed, watching it grow. I hope it finds it's way to those who are like Renee: the acorn, a small package becoming a tall and sturdy oak, giving more acorns, becoming tall and sturdy oaks, giving acorns…” See Renee's blog: Circling My Head

i recieved this award from Kate, an artist i myself admire loads, she makes the most beautiful atc's with great sewing and collages to die for if i'm ever up north of the UK i want to go play with her, for sure KATE!

i would like to pass it on to Six of the many artist i am lucky to know and truly appreciate!

i could pass it on to alot more artists but here are the ones i chose this time around

i hope you take time to visit their sites, they are all worth your time!

i can't send it back to Kate cos i would if i could!

Sheri

i wish she lived aound my corner! she feels my vibes!

Lisa cole

beautiful dolls!

Mike

he and his wife should live around my corner aswell, we would make art!!!!

and drink cheap red wine doing ithope they come to belgium in the near future!!

listening mike????

Patti

okay it is getting boring but i wouldn't mind her living closer either!!

Lynda

cos she is beautifully chaotic and brave!!

Kimmie O

again beautiful dolls!

so there you have the six artists i would like you to visit.
--------------------------------------------------------------

i've been playing with metal embossing! i'm getting the hang of it and am really loving the new possibilities for my altered art projects, i'm een thinking of giving my dolls metal dresses hihi! yep, my creative brain has twists! but i think it will look pretty neat!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i bought some more Paulo Coelho books, people!! you should really read these, he is a wonderful writer and well... look him up on interne

, give it a bit of your time and find out about him!

i have to thank J for getting to know him. (xox)

------------------------------------------------------

oh and did you hear the first song on my playlist, did you turn it off!? listen to it! it is the most beautiful lovesong of all times as far as i am concered! not that i am in love unless with life itself!

but don't you think it is a wonderful song? i love Crowded house.

J is learning some of the songs on his guitar! thanks J!

can't wait to hear you play! few more months huh!

i love Crowded house, oh i already said that... :-)

what else? well my dad is having his operation next week so i'll be away from home for a few days to be colse to him, i hope that all goes well. for one thing it is bringing us closer, we are having talks we have never had before. i still think he is really impossible and childish and will never grow up but you know what?

he is my dad and i love him and hope he sticks around for a long long time!

i would give him all the time in the world if it were up to me,

he can bug me for as long as he wants!

my daughter sent me an e-card for Mother's Day.

of course i'm not over it all yet!!!!! how can i be huh!?

but i'm letting go and dealing with it slowly.

an e-card is better than no communication isn't it?

-----------------------------------------------------

and remember, and i am reminding myself at the same time...

!!!!!!LOVE IS LIFE!!!!!!

xox tanya

a little book

2009-05-12T08:49:00.005+02:00

okay, so here is the little present i made for J!

it's a little hand-sewn book. he writes.

the covers are chipboard covered with sticky back canvas from Claudine Hellmuth, painted with the studio paints and embellished with Tim's Idea-ology things. the pages are all cut from a large sheet of beautiful paper from the art store, coloured with the Ranger distress inks and spritzed and flicked, then stamped with distress inks, some tages added with stamped texts or handwritten and some personal (not on show hihi!).

i am certainly going to make this kind of little book again, must say that the sticky canvas is so easy to use for covering! piece of cake! and i am still very much in love with the studio paints, i got al the colours now! what a luxury!!!

i will pass the blog award on tomorrow!

today i am going to draw! i have started to try men's faces, here is one i did last night, the shading is a bit rough, i was working in bad lighting so i'll smooth that out later, and i need to work on the hair more but i think you can see it's a man, heavier chin, wider face, eyebrows and nose are different... not easy to do when i've only done girls up to now! i think he turned out pretty okay really hihi!

have a great day, the Sun is nowhere to be seen here today so i'm just going to make myself a nice hot cup of tea, put some music on and pretend it's beautiful weather.

xox tanya

Evelien is the winner

2009-05-11T21:59:00.002+02:00

the winner was chosen by my art pals from abroad, it is nice that some people are voting here but only the votes from the people i actually asked to vote count, please understand this;
i did this because then i know all the votes are valid and objective and they are genuine votes from people who do not know the contestants in any way.

Evelien is the lucky winner, you can see in the comments that she had the most votes, Marie-Anne got a vote too and so did Martine. Angelique got votes but not from my chosen jury so they don't actually count but of course it is nice for her.

I will make something special for Evelien and try and get it posted this week
along with Inge's present that should have bene posted last week but didn't!

thanks to my art pals who all took the trouble in voting when i asked them whithout warning hihi! and thanks to al my chickies who sent their work in! they were all fab!!!!! proud of you all!

clearbooks of my students

2009-05-11T08:57:00.009+02:00

a while ago i gave a workshop on clearbooks and to get my chickies to finish their books i asked them to send them in before May 1st to win a little present from me. it has taken me a little longer to get them on due to not being home much and family issues but here they are now.

the way i want to vote is: i will mail some of my foreign readers and ask them to vote.

i aslo recieved a lovely blog award from Kate but i wil post that later this week!!! so come back because i will be passing it on to some cool artists! in the meanbtime you can go visit Kate's blog and see who she passed it on to! it is worth your time!

so! here are the clearbooks from my wonderful craft chickies! I think they all did a brilliant job. not everyone sent in their pictures but here are the ones who did!

i can't put all the pics on that i recieved so i will choose my two favourite pics of each person's clearbook.

their name is above their clearbook

Angelique

Evelien

Marie-Anne

Martine

Sandra

so Angelique, Evelien, Marie-Anne, Martine and Sandra ( i put you in alphabetical order) thanks for sending in your work, voting will be this week and by Friday i will post the winner! good luck to all of you!!!

i promised to post pics of my little present to J but seeing this is already a long post i'll do that later this week along with the blog award :-)

have a nice day!

mine started in loads of grrrrr and F**** i had probably not closed the freezer door properly when i shoved something in at the last minute! so the f****** freezer defrosted over the weekend while i wasn't home and my home had such nasty cat pee kinda smell when i came home, i don't have a cat so i kinda freaked but could not find the reason till this morning! so at 7 am i had to throw out a full bin bag of food! all smelly fish, scampi, steak, veg, soup, azrggghhhh! loads of money in the bin and what a job for a monday morning before my coffee!

anyway! no use in getting upset! it is done, i will now make myself a nice cuppa and move on with my day;

first i'll mail some of my readers to kindly ask them to vote for me!

Next week i will randomly choose one of my blog followers as a lucky winner for a little something from me! so if you are not yet a follower you still have time to become one!! ( see little box on the left, go up to top of blog hihi!)

xox tanya

checking in

2009-05-10T15:53:00.002+02:00

just quickly checking in because i had promised to upload some of my students clearbooks so my blog readers can vote on them but i just have not had time, i've been away from home for my dad, but i'll be able to upload them tomorrow, i hope because blogspot has a maintanance planned some time tomorrow so it might be the next day so come back to check them out.

to make the process a quick one i'll mail some of my foreign blog readers and ask them to vote so that way i will have a winner by the end of the week and they will be totally objective cos they don't know you all anyway :-) i'll be able to send something off to the lucky person soon!

J got his present so i can post pics tomorrow.

okay i'm off again, got some things to do before i can head off home

speak to you all tomorrow

xox tanya

just checking in

2009-05-05T11:25:00.003+02:00

hiya, no, i haven't dropped off the planet
i just seem to be in a periode of thinking and reading, a have been working on a little something for J but i still need to send it off in the post so i'll wait to post pics here till he has recieved it, wouldn't want to spoil the suprise! will say that i used sticky canvas, studio paints, tim's masks, needle and thread, distress inks and tim's wonderful stamps, tokens, chain,...

as i said, i'm reading alot, i am totally into Paulo Coelho!!! J recommended a couple of books and i must say i am really grateful for this!!! lovely books to read, stories that tell you something, some reflections and inspiration for life. thanks J!!! x
it's making me think loads though and that is as good as it is bad, i tend to think too much once i start off. but i'm not getting stressed or anything, maybe a tad melancholic, i admit that much, but nothing i can't handle or get rid of by doing some art journaling or poetry or just breathing and deciding to let it go. i wil soon jump into action again.

okay, off to my physical therapist again, my body is still full of painful protest, it does not agree with the changes they are trying to make in my posture even ifit is probably for the best! i kinda have stuborn muscles :-)

i'll be back soon with a bit of art to show, i'll send it off to J first.

have a great day!
xox t

yes yes yes!

2009-04-29T08:42:00.002+02:00

yes! my final divorce papers came through the post today! i am most certainly, officially, totally, truly, entirely,unmistakenly divorced! and i am doing a happy crazy relief dance let me tell you!

doesn't mean i have not been sad about my marriage ending, don't get me wrong! i would have loved for it to work out; but i don't see it a failure either. it is what it is...
we tried, things didn't add up, we were not happy together we decided to split and tried to keep it as neat as possible. okay of course there are nasty details there but they are all far gone for me, no use on dwelling on them, shit happened... i got over it!
i see it as: we were two people who once made the free choice of being together and then later on made the new decision to end it and move on, no more no less.

but i am happy it is all over, the whole journey of going through court.
i didn't take a lawyer, thought i was quite capable of talking for myself, i was pretty proud of myself to tell you the truth! i did well, it was a lesson and a new thing learned for me. i am way stronger that i look! i like this. i really am stronger than i would have ever imagined. a wisdom i am happy with.

i count my blessing believe you me! i have a wonderful life, not always the easiest, never has been, but wonderful non the less!
i never seem to take the straight road, i tend to choose the one less travelled, the senic route even though it has given me some nasty scenes...i know the good comes with some bad and it is all part of life's lessons we all need to learn so i have don't get upset about things as much as i used to;

take my 16 year old daughter who ran away from home in February, she is now living with her dad, miles away, i have only heard her a few times on msn, just quickly, how are you? and i have always started the conversation; but it does not upset me anymore, i do not take it personally , i have learned that it has nothing to do with me, she is acting from her own idea, even her own idea of me, of the way she sees me, how she sees her life, the whole world. i do not take it personally.

the fact that my marriage ended, i do not take that personally either. i started off by thinking something must be wrong with me but now i realize (and i do have this one friend who tends to open my eyes or helps me open my eyes rather, thanks J) i realize that it has nothing to do with me personally.

so, well, anyway, today the sun is shining at her best and i'm certain it is supposed to be like that today, it is my day! every day is my day come to think of it!

before i go off to enjoy my day i would just like to recommend a book to you all out there, i was happy someone recommended it to me...

this book: The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

have a beautiful day!
xox
*still doing a crazy happy dance*

i'm back from the UK

2009-04-27T10:04:00.003+02:00

hi everyone,

i've been away for a few days. i left home on thursday heading for the UK. first i went to see my dad who is extremely ill in hospital but still stuborn as ever! he is on kidney dialysis every other day cos he has kidney failure, he needs a heart bypass asap, his liver is not doing well and he had fybrosis and asbestos on his lungs which is really bad and pobably causing all the other problems. He is on a stict diet that he tries to get out of any chance he gets, rebelling with the nurses over a bit of cheddar cheese!!! oh i could go on about this but i choose not to. he has been ill for a while, we never thought he would come his far as it is and we have no idea where this is leading so my brother and i kind of look at it on a day by day basis. the fybrosis is the worst, no real treatment as of yet! we are looking at another two to three years at the most in usual cases, lets hope my dad will be with the lukcy few who live upto ten more years but i think with his kidneys we can't have false hope. i am so not at peace with this but it is not in my hands is it, i have to let it go and just be thankful for the time there is i suppose.

strangely though, my nana who had three strokes just weeks ago and who is way into her 80's seems to be doing fine, she is eating again, seems happy enough and to be getting stronger again, humans are the strangest things if you ask me. she is really dement but still seems to have a strong will te live bless her! we thought we were in for a funeral any day. let's hope she last for as long as she wants!!! as long as she feels happy!!!!

so the rest of my time was for fun, for me! i went to Olney, near Milton keynes to go visit Lin Brown, she has an amazing range of products in her shop but i totally fell for all the Ten seconds metal!! i bought metal, tools, mats, moulds,... the whole lot to get me started! she has so many beautiful projects all around the shop, all metal and mixed media, really lovely! and it was great seeing her agin too, we had a coffee and a chat in the shop seeing she was on her own that day.

oh and i did treat myself to some Tim Holtz stamps aswell, couldn't resist!!! :-)

i had the most wonderful weather too, not the rain that was forcasted! lucky lucky me!

i had lunch at a really tiny old tea shop in olney, proper english tea and a cheddar cheese sandwich cut into neat little triangles, just as i like them. i felt so spoiled actually. had a chat with a local floral artist, exchanged thoughts on things, it was so nice.

then i headed off to Oxford to meet my friend J who is still there finishing his pilot training. we had the most amazing time together, chatting and catching up for all the time apart. it is truly a wonderful thing to have this person as my friend. he is the most beautiful friend one could dream for. i know i'm blessed. i know some people would not understand and that is okay.

we went shopping for books, found none we were looking for and we both had lists haha! but i did end up buying five books so i was still pretty pleased. Oxord is a nice city! not one for parking though, omg!!! we had meals that i never ate cos my stomach wouldn't let me, so i hardly ate all weekend really, wonder if it shows on the scales hihi!? J ate most of my food so it didn't go to waste. and the lovely lady at the B&B made sure i had some toast and a boiled egg in the morning to keep me going, she was really worried about me not feeling well, so sweet. i had to take fruit with me for my travel home.

J and i had a blast the whole time we were together, nice! so nice.

Saying Goodbye to eachother was the hardest thing, the hardest thing...i never imagined it cos it is not like we are not seeing eachother again... it was really wierd. so not me, normally i am okay with goodbyes especially when i know it is not a last.

Sunday morning i decided to head off early for Dover cos there was the London Marathon going on and i wasn't sure what the traffic was going to be like. as i left i sent a text message to J to let him know i was on my way. as i came on to the main street he was standing there, he had calculated me leaving early and was waiting for a last goodbye! i mean, how sweet is that?!!!

he had felt that the goodbye we had was difficult. we had loads more hugs in us and still a million things to say and then J took the one picture we took all weekend, not the best picture, i look pretty funny in it but it is great if you ask me! the best! and look at the fab blue sky behind us! it was wonderful.

this good bye made it much easier for me to travel home, it was what we needed apparently and trust J to know that. and thank goodness for free wi fi on the ferry!!! we chatted the whole two hours i was on so that passed in a flash!

well, all things considered with my dad and so on i had the most wonderful weekend and let things go while i could. once back home i started phoning again of course to find out what was going on with the heart operation and all that.

i picked the kiddies up from there dad's and still had a two-hour drive ahead of me to get home so we arrived home at about 8 pm, long day but i enjoyed every minute of it! the drive down to dover is so beautiful, the road is up so high it sometimes feels you can touch the sky and i love skies. i felt my lungs filling with air and joy with every mile i drove. Friendship and Love filling my Soul, realizing that i am the luckiest person on earth.

so today i end with: take care of your friends and loved ones, don't assume they just know you love them, show them whenever you can and cherish time together! it fills you with energy and bliss beyond words. and miracles such as my beautiful nana is showing me can happen! i can't help but love life.

have a wonderful sunshiny day!!!

xox tanya

the winner

2009-04-22T23:38:00.002+02:00

i randomly picked a winner from the comments to my post and Inge is the lucky one this time!!!
inge, mail me your details you know my address! you will be recieving something soon, i will make you something cool with tim Holtz stuff ( hint hint)

night night
xox

okay here i am

2009-04-20T10:47:00.006+02:00

hi everyone,

i promised a bit of a report on my holiday so here goes! now, i'm not the typical tourist taking pictures all the time, most of the time i just try to enjoy without the bother of seeing the world through a lense! but i did manage to get some pictures taken.

first of all the flight was not that bad, i did feel my heart rate going up loads when we took off in brussels and then for a while we seemde to be just hanging abouve brussels and i could see nothing moving, i felt a bit of a panic rising then but told myself to stay calm and i did! after that i was fine, not reallt comfortable, no distraction next to me! i had the whole row of seats to myself so the sexy, good-looking, ...man i hoped for was not there to keep me company so i just filled out some sudokus, ah well...
then!!!! 40 minutes! yes!!! 40 minutes before landing the captain thanked us for flying with them and told us we would be landing soon! sooooooooooooooooon???? that gave me 40 minutes to build up a panic! that is looooooooooooooooooong believe me!! but i stayed calm, pretty calm! and the landing was perfect, i have never had such a soft landing! i could of kissed the captain! i was grinning like an idiot, so proud of myself, not that i was flying the plane but still i did stay calm and felt like i had overwon a barrier!

orange tree outside the bedroom is was sleeping in, the sent that came through my window was hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!

it was great seeing sue again and meeting het ohhh so british humoured husband colin, we got on like a house on fire, i think he kinda met his match in sarcasme with me hihi! we had lots of fun and i felt more than welcome in their home. colin ended up waiting on me hand and foot after i stole his reclining massage chair!! wohaaaha! i was in a lot of discomfort though with my back due to these new soles in my shoes, they are supposed to help me change my way of walking and standing to take pressure off my ankle but my body still does not agree with them and i am in aches all the time! this was a bit of a bummer on my holiday but it is not like me to let that stop me :-)

at first he weather was horrible, cold, so cold i had to by a fleece cardigan at the market but i already told you that! i also bought an antique little silver angel magnifying glass, it is beautiful! and though i am not into love and all that, this little angel does happen to be Cupid so who knows, the Universe might be telling me something here!!!! LOVE myself! hihi! you all thought i was going to tell you something different here now didn't you?

(had to hide my boobs here! my top seems to be pretty low haha!)

i bought presents for he kids, i got my youngest daughter a spanish dress and little flaminco shoes to go with it, she looks so cute in them and she loves them, never took them off yesterday.

anyway, we had a good time, visiting some of the sights, eating colin's homemade fishpie! bowling on the Wii in the evenings, drinking wine, crafting some of the time, talking about crafts all of the time according to colin that is!

anyway the six days passed way too quickly and my travel back was okay too, i got a window seat again, right at the back of the plan! sat next to a japenese and an african man, they never opened their mouths hihi! take off was fine, no elevated heart rate or anything, landing was really bumpy but i did fine on staying calm! i am really honestly proud of myself and think i have overwon my fear now.
this is the little plane i was on! only 180 seats! i call that small!

well back in belgium now! the weather is of course super!!! we sat out in the garde nall day yesterday and i took the kids to a theme park the day before, they enjoyed themselves! i was in total agony with my back but it was good to see the kiddies having fun so i didn't mind too much! i was brave and went on some of the rides, today my therapist thought my back was a bit of a mess hihi! he said i had been brave going on the rides in so much pain!

--------------------------------------

something different

my nana is ill with cancer, my dad is really ill too, my mother has been taken into a care home because of her alzheimer, she is so far gone! and she is only 59 you know? it is so sad really. it is not all sing and dance around here but i am staying positive about life! seems like it is far too short not to enjoy every minute of it!
Seeing that i have cancelled most of my workshops for the coming weeks to keep my weekends free for travelling up north for a funeral i am expecting very soon i decided to take a trip to the UK to do some shopping, visiting a friend and just enjoying my time while it lasts!!!

oh on a happier note!!!! my divorce is official as from tomorrow!!! over and done with! turning over the page, ahhhhhh, it is a relief more than anything! i don't hate him or anything, i don't wish him anything bad, i actually wish him all the best in life and i hope he will have a happy future ahead of him but i am glad we are over. we will still be mam and dad to the kids and i will do everything in my power to keep the communication going between us for the sake of the kids.

so!!! i am just me as from tomorrow!!! that is cause for celebration really! life is all about celebrating whenever possible isn't it!?

okay !this post has turned into half a book so i'm off to enjoy an hour in the garden before the kiddies come home from school! going to read a couple of pages of my book, i'm reading The Host by Stephanie Meyer, i had heard from Tim ( holtz) that lots of his friends thought it wasn't that good but i like it really. can't be compared with twilight ( same author) but non the less, i like it!

bye bye for now

i'll randomly pick a winner from the post i asked to leave a comment, i'll do that some time this week, to keep i a suprise hihi!

enjoy your day!!!

i'm not reading back for typos so just embrace the imperfections haha!

i'll post soon

2009-04-17T16:53:00.002+02:00

hi, can't really post at he moment, my back is hurting like hell and i really don't feel like sitting at the computer too long! i'll post soon, my physical therapist is on the case hihi!

have a super weekend, hope the sun comes out to play!
xox tanya

quick checking in

2009-04-13T12:35:00.002+02:00

i've been having a good time here in Spain, being pretty lazy really to tell you the truth, just relaxing, hanging, doing a little bit of crafts with Sue, also went seeing the sights yesterday, it was a great day, the weather was fine, we had a great meal, they have wonderful fish around here.

my ankle is playing up so it is a bit of a bummer when going sightseeing up in the mountains but i did well.

Sue and Colin, her husband, are really sweet and welcoming, i even had Colin waiting on me hand and foot last night haha!and he is a good cook! i got his relaxing, massaging chair last night and he never got it back all night, it was too comfy to give up!

oh, the first days the weather was awfull, really awfull, soooooooooo cold,when we went to the market on Saturday it was that cold i had to buy a fleece to wear and the man i bought it from happened to be Belgian so i had a chat in Flemish. i bought a really nice old tiny wearable magnifying glas with a little cupido angel at the top, it is beautiful, i'll post a picture soon.

today we are off to Colin's golf club for lunch and then probably have a wander around but my foot does hurt damn! tomorrow i might be meeting some of Sue's friends and then we are off to Benidorm for the rest of the rest of the day to do some shopping. and on Wednesday i will be with Sue at her shop meeting some of her customers who want to meet me cos Sue talks about me so much hihi, she has a workshop planned for them and i'll join in.

so there, a tiny update, it is hard for me to type on this qwerty keyboard seeing that i am used to an azerty keyboard and type blind so this is hard work and i have been correcting typos for ages now, i give up! hihi!

i'll get back to you all once i get home and i'll share some pics then, in the meantime i'm sure Sue will write on het blog so go click on the desire to inspire link at the side , she has put some pics on.

have a great day! enjoy the little things...

xox tanya

holiday!!!

2009-04-09T19:33:00.003+02:00

okay then! i'll be off to Spain shortly so i might not be blogging for the next week unless i can use Sue's connection, if we even have time that is, i'll see!
if not sooner, you will hear from me when i get back!
in the mean while, for those who haven't commented on my previous post, you still can if you like! when i get back i will be choosing a lucky winner to a little present... you can get yourself into the draw by commenting.

i'm still dreading the flight slightly but i am invincible as i keep telling myself!!!! invincible!!!

have a great Easter and a lovely week

tarrah for now
xox tanya

light heart bright soul

2009-04-06T10:11:00.004+02:00

Yesterday i had the most wonderful day outside with the kids, working in the garden, they helped a bit and they played lots. it was perfect weather, t-shirt and shorts weather! not that i wear shorts!!!

I planted my very first strawberries ever, giving it a go seeing i do live in Haspengouw which is the fruit region of Belgium! i planted lots and lots of pretty flowers, bulbs really, so i will be able to watch them grow into flowers! i cleaned the pond, swept the garden path, very symbolic for me, sweeping away the remains of a Winter filled with many changes, some troublesome, some for the best, some nice, some unexpected, some i saw coming, anyway, all swept away leaving a clean open path.

we had dinner outside, i just love eating outdoors, it gives such a sense of freedom and being part of nature, huge open sky, warmth on your skin, breeze through your hair, oh well, you can tell by now i am an outdoor's girl. I feel closer to the Universe when i'm outside.

i did some more drawing in my pencil art journal, i discovered that i cannot use my blending pencil on this paper! damn, it makes strange marks on my faces, too bad but they will now have to stay that way, they look weathered, maybe from the great outdoors? a lesson learned!

not the best pic here but non the less, here is my " no way back" girl, she has decided to open her heart to possibilities, as you can see on her face she is still getting used to her own idea but believes in it and will not hide from it. determinde as ever to make her life her own.this girl is rising above it all feeling free and light of heart, letting her Soul lead the way on her free and wonderful journey. she has a bright Soul and spreads love being free of burden.

(my flying doll is totally inspired by Suzi Blu! what a chick!)

more journaling will be added at the bottom but it was way past midnight when i put her down last night.

today the Sun is shining again, so i'm off to get these tv-watching kids dressed to go play outside and get some wonderful colour to their cheeks. i need to do some more weeding and cleaning up in the garden before i head off for my girly holiday in Spain with my friend Sue!!! only a few more sleeps!!!! the only thing i am dreading is the flight! i hate flying, honestly i am so scared of taking off and landing! i have never flown on my own before so it is an adventure and a huge challenge for me, one i am of course going to take because i have told myself that i can do it! i am invincible! :-) and i have a middle seat between two strangers! i can hardly cry and panic while sitting between strangers! and who knows, there might be a really cute single guy sitting next to me hihi. on the return flight i have a window seat! i am going to love that, once we have taken off that is!

anyway! i'm off to the garden!!!
you all have a wonderful day filled with pretty things and love!!!
xox tanya

ps if you were to leave a comment today i might just decide to pick a lucky person to recieve a little something....

life is love

2009-04-03T12:46:00.006+02:00

well, you know, with me being single, divorced and all that... i kind of tell myself, and the whole world for that matter, that i am going to stay single the rest of my life, love has no place in my world, done with it, got the freaking t-shirt! away with the whole relationship thing, it sucks. well it does!

and then there are those days that the sun is shining and you want to go take a walk, on your own is fine but hummmm with a partner it would be nicer? uhhhhh NO!!! men suck remember!!!!

no, there are those days, well moments really, not full days!!! God forbid! but moments that i start to feel just a little lonely, just a little ( i am not admitting to anymore than that hihi!)

but the thing is, i remember having this feeling when i was in a relationship!when i was married! even more than now at times come to think of it! which makes me believe even stronger that i am better off staying single!!!

but then i have this friend, i will name no names J! he kind of kicks my behind once in a while, he doesn't put up with my realtionship-men suck-crap, he wakes me up, he never tells me, he shows me, he let's me find out for myself, he nudges, never pushes me over the edge

this so called friend makes me cry sometimes, but at the end of the day he always makes me smile, truly smile on the inside but hang on! he is a man! ohhhh men suck remember!!!!

luckily this friend is my friend, has been for some time and always will be so no need to panic Tanya!

we are here for one thing he says: "LOVE" nothing else.

and let that be the one thing i want to cut out of my life!!! until i realised love is not to do with having a relationship! there are so many kinds of love: love for my children of course!!!! duh!! my love for my art, my love for my friends, my soulmate,my doggy, my ability to recover from anything and everything,.... i could go on for hours now you know hihi!

but then he goes further... you're on the right track babe! ... but you still need to open your heart to L-O-V-E, don't rule out possibilities of finding love, don't force it out, don't search for it! don't long for it, don't let it control your life, don't think you need it to be happy but do not rule it out!!!

pffff smart ass, was my first thought! but now...i think i am coming around to the idea... slooooowly okay J!? and... i promise not to throw away the key to my heart just yet...

but good, here i am today sharing a bit of a private conversation with you all! why? well to explain this page in my art journal! it's my travelling art journal, only pencils and markers when i'm on the road so no mixed media to help me get my thoughts sorted, just pencils and me! confronting really!!! i find it harder to do but liberating at the same time

"to fear love is to fear life"

so all there is left to do is wish you all a day filled with love, the kind you choose! free choice!!!

checking in

2009-03-29T19:26:00.004+02:00

it's been a few days, i've been busy, i've been lazy too! i had another Rangerized workshop and it went well, some total beginners who had never even used embossing powders before, this is fun really! they are amazed when i show them the difference between clear embossing, frosted crystal and distress embossing powders for example! it's like magic to them. i like beginners, gives me so much pleasure educating and helping them. they all went home with a finished portfolio of 13 techniques using distress inks, powders and perfect pearls. i was totally proud of them all! yes you too Anna!

today i had a day of rest, had a wonderful long msn chat with my friend j who is miles away again for the next few months. i'm going to try and squeeze in a visit combined with a trip to Milton Keynes to go to Linda Brown's store to get myself some kabukas and big daddy moulds and some beautiful ten seconds studio metal and tools to play with, i could get everthing sent to me but i love to feel and touch what i buy and it'll be a great roadtrip for me to do on my own, just getting a hold on things and thoughts, feeling a bit stronger, feeling British soil under my feet, doing something for myself and meeting up with j for dinner, walks and talks, i'll book a little bed and breakfast and come home the next day,sounds like a good plan! don't you think?

it is great to talk to that someone who really gets my Soul, my thoughts, my not so hidden fears and things i won't even admit ot myself at times. it is nice to have that listening ear and a voice that is not scared to disagree with you and tell you so! true friends are irreplacable.

but first i will be off to Spain for a few days of girly fun with my great lovely friend Sue, we met at Ranger U six months ago and got on straight away, from the very first second we spoke! it doesn't happen often that i make friends so easily, i'm an outgoing person at first sight but i never really let people get too close, with Sue i feel totally comfortable and i am soooooooooo looking forward to my visit. i hope we are lucky enough to have some sunshine it'll go well with the cocktails we are planning hihi! and the trip to the antique market.

my friend Micheal posted on his blog (see jack & cat) and i was happy to read his update, i've been missing the news from Arizona. Micheal was one of the Ranger U attendees last October, now nearly six months ago, looking back on it i still think it was a great experience! i met great people and i still have contact with most of them. I still have contact with Tim and Suze and Claudine at times and the wonderful other Ranger girls like Patti, Michele, Jackie!!!, Debby, Bonnie,... and i've been lucky to have been able to do quite some Ranger educating since i got my certificate. i love doing it, i love educating all things Ranger.

well, i have a pretty normal week this week, some things to do, workshop as usual and seeing a new specialist about my ankle on Thursday, hopefully i'll get some anwsers and a solution for my pain and constant swollen ankle, i wouls so love to be fully back on track again and go maybe dancing!? i so miss being able to move around freely without pain.

art: not much art done, i did draw a few dolls and did some face shading and some painting, i'm still progressing on this and i love it.

i got myself all the colours of Claudine Hellmuth's studio paint! i'm in love with this paint, i've said it before i know. but it is great paint. i gor some more of her brushes too, they are brilliant and i love the sticky back canvas and got some more of thet too. it was a treat!

i really have to clear my studio! i've been on the move so much, alot of my things are spread all over in boxes and bags, so i'm hoping to get everything back nice and neat some time this week so i can work and play a bit easier and more organized. it is a mega mess believe me!

well, off to do some preps for tomorrow, a day of photographing step by step storyboards and some filming of techniques, it'll be fun!

talk to you all soon! have a great week! remember that every moment is filled with love and joy! try not to forget even if you are having a tough time or an off-day or whatever!

xox

free time

2009-03-23T08:48:00.009+01:00

i have been working way too hard so i decided to take a little time off, i still have things on my planning that need to been done of course but in between that i will be chilling, reading, painting, making art for the sake of it! My youngest daughter Estée has her 6th birthday this Wednesday so we will be having a fun day then! off to a theme park in the afternoon and eating cake!

i have my divorce tomorrow of course, final day!!! after that i am soooooo single forevvvvvaaaa!

i love being home, my cosy own place where i can see my orchids grow, i am so proud of my orchids!!! they are doing so well; lots of new buds and some beautiful flowers.

i love being able to enjoy my home in peace and quiet, kids off to school during the day, just me and my doggy Jimmy, he sleeps most of the time though, he is so lazy for a Jack Russell!

i had a good workshop this weekend, clear albums and Ranger of course, so a Rangerized Clearbook so to speak! the girls all had fun, and all made different books, i like it when they all go home with their own style, that way i know they really learned something! they don't just copy! it is wonderful to see them all try new things and put up with my bold teaching hihi! i can be strict! i can be hard! i will tell them a thousand times how to ink up a stamp hihi! i teach lots in one class so there is a swift tempo to it! but i always have happy people in the end, people who go away with new things and that is what it is all about! here are some pics from the workshop!

don't forget to send me pics of the finished book before MAY 1st! i will ask some of my followers to choose a winner and the lucky one will recieve a present! so that should be soem incentive to finish your book hihi! have fun with that!

okay! i 'm off to do some shopping before i start painting! there is an echo when i open the fridge hihi!

have a wonderful Spring day! remember to breathe deeply and let go of any crap holding you back and be truly happy and grateful to be here! that is what i tell myself everyday! xox

oh dear i got tagged

2009-03-18T15:13:00.003+01:00

oh my goodness! Sherri tagged me! i have to take a picture of myself right here, right now, as i am, no doing up my hair or putting on a bit of make-up first! no!!! just take a pic and post!

and i am lazing in the sofa with my mini laptop on my knee,so tired, combination of having a super cold and having been to the trade show in Paris, this is going to be a great picture! but fair is fair and i play by the rules so here i am... i sight for sore eyes! (more like a sight tot cause sore eyes hihi!)

so now i will pass this on and tag some others and challenge them to do the same!

Sue ***Evelien***Mariska***Kate***Barb

have fun with this girls!!!!

okay! i'm off to get my stuff sorted for the my workshop.it's going to be a long day and a short night! i'm due in court tomorrow morning for my divorce and it is a few hours drive due to traffic around Brussels so i'll have to get up really early to avoid getting stuck and turning up too late!

i am not looking forward to tomorrow but i suppose it is just another step in the right direction and it needs to be over and done with! no use getting myself worked up about it all.

xox tanya

another day in Paris

2009-03-16T21:39:00.007+01:00

again some quick pics from the trade show, it has been a long busy day, can't complain , i did lots of make & takes and their was a lot of buzz and sparkle (i'm working with glitter!) flying around.

i do have the worst cold ever! i suppose because of the air-co at the show so today i had a bit of a heavy head on me and i found the french language just a bit more non-understandable then yesterday hihi but out of it all i did well, pleased with my own efforts really! :-)

i took my 45 min break and went straight to Tim, Suze, Mario and Leandra a mais oui!

Tim made me the most beautiful flower brooch using Grungepaper! it is ab fab!!! after he made it he even kept looking at it and i told him he was not getting it back hihi! Suze was coughing up ideas about making a hairpin out of it but it is going on my leather jacket and i can't wait to make some myself and do this in a workshop! when i get my hands on the Grungepaper that is!

anyway! here are the pics! Jan just gave me whisky to tackle my cold and to have a good night's sleep! the Ranger crew are not at the show tomorrow and i'll be leaving early myself so probably no pics tomorrow or maybe some of me working!? ah, could do that.... prove that i don't just wander around bugging Ranger :-), i can't help myself, i want to know everything! as a Ranger Educator i want to stay tuned and totally up to date! ( good excuse, you think?)

okay, we are pulling daft faces and that is all Mario's fault! he was being funny! we are not to blame for this! you reading this mario!!!?

after spraying, drying and stapming some die-cut Grungepaper flowers Tim painted and distress-stickled some die-cut andCuttelbugged Grungeboard and then put together to make a geat brooch! for me!!!
Mario then said! go on! we need antoher picture , now with the brooch! so again tim and i broke out the smiles and after a couple of really sillp ics this one turned out pretty much usable hihi!

those guys crack me up!

this is the finished brooch in all it's glory on the bedside table in my hotel room! is it not fab??? i love it! i am blessed to a have recieved some beautiful art from now Suze and Tim! and again some brilliant ideas to work with!

Suze was over the moon with a ring she made at the stand i was working! she made it with Inez, lovely girl! Suze was still showing it off hours later, believe me! hilarious she is sometimes! you gotta love her!! i'm sure she will blog all about it soon so go check her out.

okay! off to bed with cuppa and the rest of the film i didn't finish yesterday!

tomorrow i'll be back home and not sad for that either! not that i will be sitting on my backside! workshops to be done and another Be Rangerized the coming weekend! looking forward to that!Anything for Ranger! you know that!

xox night night

Paris Trade Show SMAC

2009-03-15T21:21:00.003+01:00

okay, as promised some pics from Paris Trade show SMAC, quickly cause i'm pretty shattered, i didn't sleep all that well last night and it has been a busy day which is a good thing of course.

I had a quick chat with Tim, he was in action as usual

a longer chat with Suze

and she made me a cool piece of Utee art with a happy accident that we both loved to bits!!!

Tim thought we were a bit wacky but hey! we don't care hihi!

i had a few chats with Mario bless his soul, he is the cutest guy ever! i mean that! he is so relaxed it always makes me smile and feel happy when i see him! he like a happy tablet hihi!

it was a busy day but i did take about 45 minutes break to have a bite to eat while i had a look around the show, tomorrow i will do the same. it is not a bad idea to take breaks, the days are long and speaking french the whole time is so damn tiring! hihi at least i try to speak it! don't think it is that good mind! people do understand me so i'm okay, i can live with it!

i'm going to jump into the shower, then off to bed with a film on my laptop and a nice cup of tea.

hope i'm not up all night because of the food i had, i tried to keep it low fat and simple so wish me luck.

talk to you soon

xox au revoir

yes!

2009-03-12T04:37:00.002+01:00

yes yes yes!!! i found that *stupid* missing part of my charger!

hummmm... at the bottom of my... handbag?! i know! terrible really! it was the only place i had not turned upside down! so before going to bed (cos i'm not a quitter!) i simply emptied my handbag onto the table...one GPS, diary/agenda,shoppinglist, reciepts, enough loose change to buy a coffee even in the US hihi, pens, pencils, rulers, yes plural! terrible but i go nowhere without some drawing supplies! 2 notepads, deodorant, 2 bottles of perfume, chapstick(s) paracetemols to last a year! throat tablets,other medication, earphones for my cellphone/mp3, polo mints (don't think i'll eat them!!!gah!) and some more items and then tadadada.... the very last find was the plug part of my charger!!! dancing around like a looney!!
let it be a lesson!!! (note to myself!)

so !!! i hope to get lots of pictures taken at SMAC in the short breaks i will be trying to have!

have a good one! hope you don't have a sore throat, headache and temperature like i am at the moment! causing me to lay awake at four in the morning sipping tea and surfing the net!

good thing i have a strong mind cos the body isn't really working with me hihi!

xox

checking in

2009-03-11T14:13:00.006+01:00

just checking in!

i have been a bit absent, for several reasons: i'm not really doing much art at the moment, too busy preparing for Paris and other things to be playing and creating for myself.

and... i lost a part of the charger for my camera!!! so the battery is obviously dead and i can't charge so i can't take pics... so i can't put any pics on my blog!!! i have nooooooooo idea what i have done with the part! i had it in my suitcase on my last trip, that i am certain of... i didn't even use it on that trip! but now it is nowhere to be seen! i have checked everywhere i can think of and more! i give up!!! well for today! i would love to load the battery before going to Paris!!! imagine not being able to take pics of Suze and me, Tim and me, Mario and me, okay you get the picture hihi!

what have i been up to? well i've been working on samples and make & takes for SMAC Paris, sunny bright little projects with lots of flower power and glitter! i am covered in glitter as we speak!! it is e-vvvvvvvvvvv-erywhere! i think i'm even breathing in glitter! *cough* yes! glitter!

i recieved this from Mariska it's a top 10 favourite blog award! thanks Mariska
the idea is that i pass it on to my own top Ten favourites!!!

i can't send it back to Mariska, though she is one of my favourites! Evelien already recieved this from Mariska si i won't send it to her though she too is one of my favourites!

you know what??? i suggest you give everyone on my blogroll a visit!!! they are after all my favourites!!!

i recieved this friends badge from my lovely Arizona art pal Sheri!!! we have never met in real life (yet!) but we got to know eachother through Micheal aka jack & cat, my favourite beeswax guy evver!! his wife is an artist too, they are so lucky to be able to work together! they make cool stuff ( check them out if you haven't already!) they are on my blogroll

anyway, here is the friends badge

These are the guidelines that came with the badge:
"These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these kind writers."
When you pass the award along please include these guidelines. I am to choose eight friends to share this with. again a very difficult task!! who do i choose? i have lots of online art friends who blog! not all of them are on my blogroll because some of them are only in dutch and not understandable for the rest of the world! that is the only reason you are not on my roll my flemish and dutch pals!!! i can't put links up that my visitors won't be able te read.

having said this, i get complaints that my blog is only in English!!! and not in dutch too! pfff i know my friends but at the end of the day, i am english! it is easier for me to write english even though my dutch is just as good, and then the fact that it is all a bit time consuming for this single- self-supporting- working- sometimes tired mama- artist, you understand? don't you? hope you all do cos it is just not do-able for me to do two languages.

my 8 friends i want you to check out!

Sue, she is soooo my pal!!! my mate! my friend! i can't wait for my visit to her in Spain in April!!

Kate, northern lass like me! i love her ATC's, check her blog out!

Barb, she is going for her dream even though it is not always easy!

Michelle, my Jersey Shore girl! wish i was closer! i know a great place for cocktails in Long Branch!! :-)

Evelien, well, what can i say? she used to stalk me, you know? !she is okay now hihi

Suzi, a wonderful wacky artist with a heart and soul i love! she is moving to San diego as we speak! go girl!!!

Margie, i just met her a few weeks ago! but i love her vibe! doors will open!!!

and last but not least

Tim he shares and supports like no other! he deserves to be on my list! i know he hasn't got time to pass this one, he is on his way to Paris it this very moment!

did i mention that i am going too?! did i? haha

so that was it for now, back to my samples, packing my bags, getting the cupboards and fridge filled, ironing to be done, bills to be paid, dog to be washed! he smells!!!! i don't know what he has been up to! pffff

hope you are all having a wonderful sunshine-filled day, like i am!

xox tanya

wonderful sunshiny day

2009-03-03T16:19:00.003+01:00

it is such a nice day today,

the Sun is shining, the Skies are blue,

pretty fluffy white clouds floating by.

tiny buds visable on the trees,

snowdrops hanging their heads so pretty and shy

yet proud and far stronger than one would expect!

daffodils are coming soon! i can see them peeping through the soil.

in the house all my orchids are budding and blooming!

so pretty!

my heart feels liking leaping and singing and dancing,

all at the same time.

the Sun warms my heart, makes me feel everything is possible,

all will be okay, all is okay!

i've been working on some really colourful projects for Peel-off for SMAC Paris and yesterday i had a make & take with a small version of one of my projects and everyone went home cheerful because of the colours we used! i loved it!

putting smiles on so many faces made me forget how much pain i was in!

super!

because i've been working on projects that i can't show just yet i have no art to show.

my head is full of ideas, i want to make some soldered collage memory frames,

i want to beeswax my tim holtz stampcases,

i want to draw dolls, i want to do pages in my journal,

i want to get some paint on my fingers, some glitter or gesso in my hair...

but... i still have loads to do for SMAC so i need to work and not play ...

anyway, i hope you are all having a great day!

i know some places over in the US are having some beautiful snow hihih!

and that is great too!

but i am enjoying this feeling of Spring that is in the air today here in Belgium!

taking deep breaths of fresh air.

filling my lungs with pure happiness and joy for life!

enjoying the moment.

i have a few other reasons for feeling happy and blessed

but just let's leave it at the Spring feeling making me happy and cheerful hihi!

have a good one! xox

check out Alain!

2009-02-27T08:47:00.002+01:00

Alain is a co-owner at Ranger, he is not a crafter but a sales person! but i guess after travelling so much with tim he has caught the bug hihi! here is a video of a small project he made! it is super! i love it!!! He rocks! and you have to love his accent! i've met him a couple of tmes now and he is such a gentleman!
check out this video it is worth it! i promise!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vutIjVOFBeo&feature=subscription

good weekend

2009-02-23T12:04:00.004+01:00

hi all!

glad the weekend is over hahah! it was a good one! filled with loeds of Ranger fun and education but a heavy one to say the least, lots of teaching, travelling, eating out of the house, and that doesn't go down well with me!

i went for dinner with my friend L on Saturday evening and once again i ended up being really ill, all night! getting up at 7 the next morning didn't leave me much time to feel alot better before i started teaching, but i managed and as the day went on i felt okay! only after the lesson i kind of got hit by a hammer and had a hard time driving home, 2 hours drive, got some coffee and chocolate to help keep me going! but as soon as i got home i got the kiddies off to bed and i was in bed by a quarter past nine myself. i don't know what it is with me and food; i am never ill when i prepare food myself, i use hardly use oil and when i do it's sunflower sometimes but mostly olive, i never use salt, just generally eat healthy even thougfh i do stick frozen pizza in the oven once in a while, they don't make me sick. whenever i eat out i end up ill, really ill, the whole deal! it is frustrating really cos i don't know why? i'm starting to think it has something to do with animal fat or something, maybe food prepared with butter, cream, milk? i don't eat meat as it is, only fish but that is a different kind of fat isn't it? and i did have vanilla icecream for dessert! i don't know but i am going to try and get to the bottom of it cos it is realy difficult seeing that i do eat out quite often.

anyway, appart from that i had a good weekend! a great workshop on Saturday! my ladies all madfe wonderful boxes with a collage of Ranger techniques: alcohol inks, dye inks, dimensional pearls,... we had a fun time and they all went home with a finished box and were all pleased with themselves, they never thought they would get it finished in that time but then they should know better hihi! we get things done!

Sunday i had a shop owner and an educator to tutor, i Rangerized them with 26 techniques and tons of product info, they were over the moon with their tags on a ring, we worked hard! it was fun and a good thing for me to be able to repeat some of what Tim taught me! a good reminder for myself going through it hihi! nothing i enjoy more than teaching Ranger! but you already all know that i suppose :-)

today is my day of rest, the kiddies have a week off school for carnaval but they are off to the after-school-care, having fun with the other kids and letting me have a bit of a rest, i'm picking them up in a little while so that we can still do some fun stuff together today that way they get the best of both worlds hihi! playing with their friends and then some serious mom time!

it is a juggeling job being a single mom but i manage pretty well i think, i hope...

my 7 year old son got into bed with me this morning and told me i am the most beautiful mom he has ever seen. now how's that to start my day haha! he is so cute! hope he stays like that! he'll make some woman happy one day!

see the flowers on this lo? well it seems everone is so into this type of punched circle flowers so i kind of tried my Grungy twist on them, Colorcore, wrinkled, scratched, sanded down, ripped at the edges and a heart of tim's cool sprocket gears and brads, i think they turned out pretty cool :-) icould of put some ink to them, ummm ...well next time...
so yesterday i spent a fortune on circle punches hihi! i have all the Cricuts in the house put spent all that money on old-fashioned punches, i know i'm strange huh! but i love them!

okay! you all have a great day! i've got another half hour before i'm off to my physical therapist so i'm going to do some reading with a cup of tea

byebye! take care! have fun!

xox

checking in!

2009-02-20T10:54:00.003+01:00

open roads ahead, they don't scare me! i'm embracing the changes in my life!

hiya! just checking in, i know i've been a little down and less creative these last few days. i'm getting to feel better, i'm feeling pretty uplifted, not having any panic attacks through the night anymore! i am a strong person and will get through anything this world presents me!

i'm getting packed for another weekend of "Be Rangerized" workshops! Something i love doing!

this afternoon i'll be off to the kiddie's school to join them for carnaval! not my favourite pass-time, i'm not really into the whole carnaval thing but they love it so i promised to be there and join them as they go around the village showing off their costumes and then off to their dance party. i'm dreading all the noise to be honest but a promise is a promise and they love me being there so hey! i'll live through it hihi! i'll be brave!! i'll smile and take loads of pics!!

Grey's Anatomy was back on tv last night! dubble episode to start off! ohhh i love Grey's Anatomy so i had a good evening :-) i didn't cry though! usaully i cry my eyes out, guess i've shed too many tears in real life these last days.

no more tears, no more lump in my throat. my youngest kids need a happy mammy! i need to be a happy me! no matter what!

Saturday night i'm going out for a night on the town, a late birthday celebration (my birthday was in December hihi!) my friend L and i live so far appart it is difficult to plan a night out but now we are going out to have some fun! looking forward to it! my son will be driving me home hihi! so no need not to have a couple of drinks! i'm thinking Mojitos yay!!!! well just 1 or 2 cos i am teaching on sunday! i'll be a good girl, i think :-) we'll see... we'll see... wohaahah...

thanks for all the beautiful thoughts you have been sending me! alle the beautiful mails and messages, i feel more than blessed to have some wonderful caring people in my life how ever far some of you might be, i feel surrounded by friendship. thank you!

oh and my anonymous turned out to be SHERRI aka little black scap cat!!! in arizona! xox we kind of "met" through Mike from Jack & Cat, small, small world really!

okay! back to packing!
i hope you can all feel my vibes getting better!
my heart feeling stronger!
my arty hands getting itchy to create again!!

have a wonderful weekend!

xox tanya

feeling the SUN on my Soul

2009-02-18T12:03:00.004+01:00

i'm allowing myself to smile, to feel joy, to feel the Sun on my face, let it warm my Soul.

No matter what is going on in my life, the pain that i'm going through, i need to live, breathe, feel happy, joy, love, light, comfort, peace... i have to let go; i am letting go! clear the traffic from my head and feel the Sun! just feel the ground beneath my feet, the beuty around me, the love i am recieving from unexpected places. the support am i feeling is not going to waste! i am pulling through! i am reflecting love despite my dark times. I won't even try and hope for the future, i want to live today! just be me, now, today! wake up from this nightmare, just hope she is okay where she is and hope she will be wise enough to work on her own future and know that i am still here if she needs me, i am her mam, always will be.

but i am also Me and i have the right to be Me and not let myself spiral down.

my good friend J says that it is not ME that is hurt, only my Ego and i do believe him on this! when i think about it all, my Ego is hurt! i was trying to be the best mother possible, to prove myself as a mother, fighting to give them everything, loosing myself in rushing through my days, forgetting that it is not all up to me! i can only do so much! i've learned that now, i'm letting her go, hoping that she will be happy in her choices.

i am going to breathe, find peace, day by day this will become easier i'm sure! i have lovely people supporting me and caring for me.

My Soulmate is thousands of miles away but he still hears my calls and feels when to comfort or to give me the damn objective truth. i am blessed to have him on my path!

my BFF S is sooooooooooo supportive! she sends me text messages before i go to bed, she sends me comfort and sweetness! i am overly blessed! i know that! i do i do! i really do!

so! let the Sun do her Thing!

taking a day off

2009-02-16T12:07:00.003+01:00

taking a day off to get myself and my Soul sorted, i'm a bit at drift and need to find harbour,and peace is this strange and painful world, come to terms with people who are the closest to my heart being the ones hurting me the most. own flesh and blood. but as i said, letting go, finding peace, not searching for guilt or reasons, wrongs or rights, just letting go, breathing, pulling the dagger out of my ego and letting my Soul know that i am far bigger than anything that can happen to me... i'm still breathing aren't i? well there you go! i'm off to a good start :-)

have a wonderful day! i'm sure going to try and have a beautiful day!