Ranger educator

Tuesday, 15 September 2009

i know it's been a while

oh i have been a bad blogger but life has been keeping me busy.

Summer came and went in a flash, the kids have been back to school two weeks already, we are still getting used to the early mornings and catching the schoolbus on time.

Estée is now in school and no longer in kindergarden, so that means homework! and she takes it seriously, so cute, learning to read and write and she is already so good at it.
smart girl my little six year old, the youngest, in school, time kind of flies.
and not only when you are having fun i have found out.

my mother has Alzheimers, she is 59 and has been ill for a long time now, i haven't followed it from close, we hadn't really spoken in years and before that we never had a real connection, i grew up in England with my dad and only got to know my mother as a teenager, it was too late to connect.

she is in the final stage and it is so sad to witness this degrading illness taking away who she was. Her partner in life is a real saint, he has been taking care for her through out the whole thing, i hope she realized how lucky she was with him.
it sounds hard but i never actually had a mum but now i know i never will have one, no more chances.

all i can do is forgive her and wish her a safe journey. and i have done just that. what else is there? i hope she has peace with herself, that her soul has learned in this life.

i used to think i was superwoman but now i admit to being a little tired. the whole ordeal with my daughter, the Sudeck in my foot, my divorce and now my mother, it seems to be too much to handle in one little year.

but i am who i am and i get through things, i always do... so i will this time too!

i am lucky to be able to ventilate in my art, i still draw every evening and i still paint and i write and it all helps me to stay sane. i am lucky to have friends to talk to when i need to.

so as you see life has been throwing lemons at me, just a matter of figuring out how to make the lemonade.

you all bear with me i will have some art to show for all this once i get through it.

thanks for stopping by, have a great day and take care

love, t


  1. What a little "mini me" you have there!!! She has your shape face, your chin and cheeks,etc,etc - so cute.

    Sorry to hear how much worse your Mum has got - its so sad - I am at the end of a phone anytime if you need me you know that.
    Your art and your friends will help you through.

    Big hugs
    Sue xx
    PS Sod the lemonade, stick them straight into a glass of gin!!!

  2. Hoi Tanya,
    Ik wens je sterkte in deze moeilijke tijd!

    Lieve groetjes Carla

  3. Hello, I just happened upon your blog and had to comment. I love you artwork. I looked at your last 3 post and you started all of them off with an apology. Don't ever apologize for not blogging everyday - it will take the enjoyment out of it.

  4. Hi Tanya,
    Sorry about your mum and all you had been through this year, but you will get through and you know we are here for you anytime!
    Your Estee is a little wonder, she is gorgeous!
    So glad to see you back in blogland!
    Lots of love,
    Sanda xx

  5. Hey there!! All this time I've been MIA - so have you!! Busy summer. Working our way into Fall. (Temps are finally cooling...) Also some new adventures for me, though I have mixed feelings about teaching. I feel a bit trapped to create only things that can be reproduced for classes. Hmmmm.... Therefore, I have not created a single thing that truly makes me happy for quite some time now!! Any advice from a seasoned pro??

    Your daughter it lovely. They grow up so fast. Mine is in 4th this year, with 5th for math and language. Talk about homework!!

    So sorry about your mom. Having gone through the loss of my FIL this summer all I can say is enjoy each moment... they are fleeting.

    Always here!!

  6. I just found your blog and liked the paintings you are doing in the online class. Nice work!

  7. Welcome back Tanya...you really have had one heck of a year! But then isn't that why we have our art...for our mental health.

  8. Hello Tanya

    You ARE a strong woman, but this doesn't mean you can't be tired too. Life can be hard sometimes and sometimes it all comes together too shortly after each other, so you have the feeling you can hardly breathe...

    It's good to hear you have friends around you in those difficult times and that you get energy through creating.
    Live day by day, enjoy each small good thing every day again and you will get through.Time heals not all wounds, but makes them softer...


  9. Hoi Tanya,

    Geweldig die tag die je gemaakt hebt, het is net of alles in goud veranderd wat je onder handen krijgt, alles is even mooi wat je maakt. Ik hoop dat ik nog heeeeeeeeel veel van je kan leren. Ik kijk al uit naar de volgende Tag die je gaat maken. Groetjes Hilda


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