Ranger educator

Tuesday, 8 February 2011


okay chemo sucks! I'm am not one of the lucky few that go through firs chemo like a breeze! it is awful and heavy!

the first evening i felt so ill, i was as white as a sheet and just crawled up in a ball when i got home
the weekend was better! much better! i could eat quite normally but then i was still on heavy meds against the nausea, Emend is a goooood drug lol!
but after 2 days of meds that was it, i became so ill, i couldn't hold anything down, no food, no drinks, i felt so sick and exhausted and ended up spending half a day in hospital on Wednesday trying to get some fluids in me and getting a miracle shot of Litican.
i kept taking Litican in tablets for the next day or two and slowly i was able to eat again.

i had a wonderful weekend with my daughter Debby, she came home for the weekend. We even went into the city to a Goth shop lol, totally her scene, we had a fun time together.
Sunday i wasn't feeling my usual self, muscle aches and splitting headache and just so tired but i stayed up until Debby left and then went straight for a nap. woke up shivering and damn i had a fever and i am not supposed to have fevers so off to emergancy i had to go and yeah they kept me in hospital.
thank goodness for wireless in the hospital because i'm still here!!
my white blood cell count is too low, my platelets are too low and i have an infection they cannot localize, still getting high temperatures and my blood pressure is way too low.

Chemo was just too heavy for my body and is kicking my butt! but the doctors are thinking up all things possible to make the next round easier on me.

i'm bored stiff in hospital! no visitors allowed besides family, but not the kiddies so i skype with them and they enjoy that. private room for fear of infection so nobody to talk to... pfff days are long and daytime tv sucks!!!

well anyway, waiting for my white blood cell count to go up up up!!! and fever to stay away for at least 48 hours and then i can go home! sadly my temperature is still too high at the moment so it kind of sucks!!!

and then.... next week back to chemo with hopefully more meds against the side effects of the poison!

1 down 5 to go! i just hope they all don't put me in hospital cos the journey is already a long one and it is really hard organizing everything with the kids.

oh and my hair is shaved, Debby did it for me so now i won't have to go through seeing it drop out.
well it is already droppin out but it doesn't feel so bad because my hair is only 1mm long now :)

right almost lunchtime here! that'll be an adventure again!!! i know hospital food is not like home cooking but damn it's bad! asa vegeterian i have a choice of 2 diff burgers, honest to god you could kill someone with them, they are so hard and dry. soup has beef or chicken stock in it so not for me either! i have actually got my own cup a soups with me and a tiny kettle and my son brings me home made bread so at least i get something to eat.
doesn't feel like the right place to get my strength back! when i was in here for my back surgery i lost 4,5kg, with my mastectomy i lost 3kg in 4 days so i wonder how much it'll be this time!

ok, my tray arrived lol i have to go

love & peace


  1. So glad you posted today, been wondering how it's going. First let me tell you how BRAVE you are! That is no small thing, and once you get to the end of "whatever it takes" to get well you will know without a doubt you CAN do anything! Wish I could think of something to make that darn hospital stay not so boring ;-) Thank goodness for internet and skype! Maybe a really juicy good book? My fav would be Outlander by Diana Gabaldon. If you LOVE the first one like a kazillion other people did, you can continue the series which is several books now. Or... maybe get a sketch pad and draw your version of these warriors that are eating your cancer. Lots of water color pencils....I want you to know I'm praying and sending you lots of hugs and looking forward to your next post. You are amazing.

  2. **HUGS**
    Not much more I can say. Thinking of you every day!!

  3. Hei lieverd,
    als ik alles zo lees valt het allemaal niet mee he. Jeetje wat heftig zeg. Ik leef heel erg met je mee.
    Maar volhouden hoor, je bent een stoere sterke vrouw, heb ik altijd al gezegd na alles wat jij al meegemaakt hebt.
    Heel veel liefs en een dikke knuffel hier uit Nederland. Die kan je vast gebruiken.

  4. sweetheart, I am sooo sorry.Big Hugs xxx.
    Will phone you tomorrow afternoon if you are allowed calls. Hold on in there. xxxxxxx

  5. Hoi Tanya,
    Ik kwam vanmorgen bij Catrien binnen en alles zag er anders uit, nou ja anders.... meer ruimte. Toen hoorde ik waarom er zoveel ruimte was omdat jij er niet was. (Nam jij nu echt altijd zoveel ruimte in? ;o))En toen hoorde ik wat er gebeurd was. Jeetje zeg! Daar schrok ik toch wel van hoor!

    Maar jij sterke vrouw... je gaat het redden... dat weet ik zeker!

    Groetjes Carla

  6. I dropped by to wish you a Happy Valentines Day. I'm glad to see you are able to blog. That is one hell of a sucky "diet" you are on girlfriend... I'm keeping good thoughts that the white blood cell count goes up and fever goes down.


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